It started with you telling me that where we go today didn't matter, all you wanted was for us to spend time together. The tone was set and I knew exactly what we needed to do. I didn't choose it consciously but we re-enacted our first 3 dates. I think we did it without intending to because it was during these 3 dates that our fate started becoming intertwined.
When we got to our first destination for the
day, I handed you my gift. The way your eyes lit up when you first used
it, it will be embedded in my head. You looked so happy with it. The way
you thanked me, I knew you loved it. However, you had a small surprise
for me as well. You asked me to listen to a song and while I was
listening to it, you were singing to me as well. "You by Basil Valdez."
When you were singing it to me, I was falling in love with you all over
We had coffee at Starbucks. There were
moments I would talk and talk and you would just be staring at me and I
would get this feeling that you're not really listening but simply
staring at me. I don't know what you're thinking. Sometimes, I like to
think that you're marveling at the fact that we are together or you're
happy that you are with me. I really don't know what's going on in your
head whenever I catch you simply staring at me. These are the moments
that I wish I could read your mind.
We talked. You
finally allowed me a look into your life. Yes, a look, not just a
glimpse. I felt so happy that I am finally seeing sides of you and I
didn't even have to ask. You just shared. It is a wondrous feeling to
know that maybe, just maybe, you are starting to let down some of your
We didn't realize it but hours had already
passed. We were just sitting there and talking, enjoying the moments
between us and the fact that we were together. Nothing fancy just like
what you said.
After, we went to our safe place.
You asked me to sing you a song and it was "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing."
I obliged. I realized at this point that you will miss me, us. I
realized that it was affecting you just as much as it was affecting me
and you were simply trying to be strong perhaps for both our sake. I
hugged you tight and didn't say a word. I hope that through holding you
in my arms I was able to comfort you.
Lastly, we went
to Mystic Brew. This was where we first had our date. I still remember
it clearly. You got lost and when you finally arrived, you were sweatin'
and I wasn't impressed. I had no idea that you would make more than an
impression in my life.
You handed me a box. You said
that this was the gift that you have been wanting to give me. It broke
my heart a little because I remember you said that you would only give
me this on our last day together before you leave. This was it.
when I opened it, my heart was swept over with love. You seemed anxious
and worried that I wouldn't like it. DINGBAT. How could I not love
this? This is the most exquisite gift that I have ever received.
It is simply beautiful. I can't believe that this was your gift for me. I felt special, very special.
gift of music seemed to have paled in comparison to this but I know
that you love your music as well so I hope you'll enjoy your Spotify
Premium and earphones just as much as I will enjoy writing using these.
It's amazing. We both gifted each other with things that we know the
other would enjoy. Guess its that kind of love between the two of us.
just like that, the night was ending. I still had a surprise for you
though. You see, I knew that you wanted to see me perform and I knew I
could make it happen so unknown to you, I planned it with friends.
Thankfully, they were all artists and romantics so they agreed to help
had the table where we had our first date reserved. They even put a
small vase of flowers to gave it a romantic feel which you just found
funny. My silly bear. After dinner, my friend finally arrived and
without even talking, he knew that we were to play out a scene where he
"pretends" to call me and force me to sing. Unfortunately he gave you a
clue when he said that the music was for you because you were leaving.
in front of you was nervewracking. I was so nervous. What if you hated
the attention and walked out? What if you didn't like how I sang? What
if I open my mouth and nothing comes out or worse, I am severely off
key? What if I choke in the middle of singing? Fortunately, none of
I sang you 3 songs and I could see you
giving me that look you give me when you're staring at me when we're
talking. I saw the small smile playing on your lips. I saw you clap
after every song. Most importantly, I saw that you were happy.
walked to my house. We did this because when we had our first date, you
asked if you could walk me to my house. This time around though, I
wanted more time with you and so after we dropped off my things, I asked
to go back to your car and have 5 more minutes with you. I almost cried
there but was able to stop myself.
When you said
"enough. This is going to make it hard for me." I know that I had to
stop. I had to stop before I became too emotional. You see, I didn't
want to add more burden to the heaviness you must be feeling. Like what I
would always say, I love you in the way that I just want you to be
"Till we meet again." This is what we said to
each other. No goodbye. It is not goodbye. We will see each other again.
No tears. I went down your car and watched you drive away. I promised
to myself that I will not cry ... in front of you that is. Soon as your
car left my sight, the tears fell. You told me to not cry but I cannot
The love of my life is leaving and it will be
months before I see you again and hold you in my arms. It hurts. It
hurts so much. However, I promise that I will use the sadness to be more
creative, to be better in my work and in my business, and to push me to
be a much better person so that when we see each other again, you would
be reminded of the woman that you fell in love with albeit a much
better version of who I am.
We had a perfect day. The
coming months, it won't be perfect but WE ARE WORTH IT. You told me you
didn't believe in long distance and so I asked you why you wanted to
have one with me and you said, "I felt that what we have, its worth a
I disagree. We are worth more than a shot. WE ARE WORTH IT.
I love you my Bear. Please stay safe. And remember, CHOOSE US. Your Bella's heart is in your hands. Choose not to break it.