Today, I finally let go of him. I let go of the hopes and dreams I had that we would ever get back together. I let go of the love that I thought would last forever. Today, I finally, truly let go of the funny man.
For months, I kept reading that I should unfriend and block him on facebook, that I should unfollow and block on twitter. I shouldn't know what he was feeling or thinking. I should not bother finding out.
I fought back.
I wanted to know what I could. I viewed his profile like crazy. Soon as I wake up, I'd check his facebook page and twitter. I'd check every post he made and look who liked it or commented on it. I checked and checked and checked.
When he would post something new, I'd test it around my head, looking for a nuance that it was about me. When he didn't post for days, it would drive me insane because then I wouldn't know what he was thinking about. When he does post something and I think its for another girl, I'd go evenr crazier and cry like crazy.
It was unhealthy.
I was going out of my mind and I would cry at random moments. I couldn't keep it together and I would simply fall apart even at work. The tears just wouldn't stop coming. I couldn't control my feelings. I was no longer in control of anything.
Ironically, the funny man was also not doing okay. He was also affected by the fact that we were no longer together and that we weren't seeing each other. He was affected but he wasn't doing anything about it. He wasn't going to do anything about it. He wasn't ready and he didn't know when he would be ready.
He wasn't okay.
I had to let go. I had to ... for my sanity, for my mental health, for my hearts sake. You see, I still love him .... very much. But he's not okay ... and I don't know when he will be ... and I do not know that when time comes he is okay, if he will still want me.
Yes ... I do not know. I do not know anything anymore. I used to believe that it would be him and I ... that when things become okay, it would still be him and I.
He's not okay. I'm a bit okay. I'm scared that time may come that he is okay and I won't be okay. I didn't want that to happen and what's happening is I'm slowly destroying myself by choosing to love him more than I love me. I had to choose me.
I have to choose me.
I saw him last night. We talked. I told him that I would be cutting ties. He said that it is what he wanted me to do. It hurt when he said that. It seems to him, this is but natural. Perhaps, its because he is a guy and therefore less emotional. Perhaps, he really does not love me as much as he used to. Perhaps ... perhaps it is how it should be.
He said he misses me ... but it was just really too painful what happened. He said that maybe when he's okay and he still longs for me, he would court me. If he longs for me. IF.
So I let go. When we parted ways, I still didn't know what I would do ... if I actually could cut ties ... and then when I saw the laptop, I realized that it really just hurts too much. I had to cut ties. I also realized that I should just do this in one blow.
I normally have delayed reaction but this time, I just fell apart just like that. I saw his anniversary gift to me and I saw the cabinet and I simply fell apart. I just fell on the floor and I just started crying.
He said he would feel hurt when I do that but it is what needs to be done for my sanity and also possibly, his. So I did it.
I changed the relationship status on facebook. It took me several minutes. I kept going between single and in a relationship with the funny man. I kept hovering between the two. I kept changing between the two. I didn't want to be single. I wanted to be with him. But he doesn't want to be with me and so I had to accept that.
I hovered the mouse over SAVE and closed my eyes and hit SAVE. Done. Just like that .... my status went from In a Relationship with the funny man to Single. After one year and 7 months of dating him, US was no more.
I broke once more.
After, I bulldozed my heart with one hit right after the other. Unfriend, block, unfollow, block. Done. I don't know if there's anything left to break.
I am so broken but I did it. I did it. This time, I chose me. It may hurt like hell but I had to do it, the same way he had to leave and choose himself.
Perhaps, our paths would cross again if we're really meant to be. Perhaps, he'll meet someone new and she'd be the one. Perhaps I would. Perhaps .... we would never really know.
For now ... he needs to go his own way without me looking over his shoulders all the time, quietly obsessing and I need to go m own way as well. For now, he needs to be okay again and I need to heal as well. For now, this is the end for the story of the funny man.
The curtains closed last April 16. The actor took a final bow last July 21. Today, 30th of August, the lights finally turned off for the chapter of the funny man. Whether this story continues or is truly at its end, only fate knows.
This time, everything is truly up to fate.
Friday, August 30, 2013
Monday, August 26, 2013
Solaire Food Court
This is probably the fanciest food court that I have ever seen in my entire life. The ceiling, the lights, and the chairs were not what you normally would see in a food court.
They currently have 6 food places that you can choose from. Sapporo which is for the Japanese cuisine, Pan Asian for Indian and Mediterranean food, Hong Kong, Chicken Licken which is all about chicken, Americano and then the Pattiserie.
We tried the American this time and it was oh so worth it. The chili dog which is only Php175 is definitely worth every peso. I definitely enjoyed it and though I ate only half, I was feeling full already.
We also had the Nachos which is Php120 only and it was really filling as well. I also loved that they did not scrimp on the toppings. Definitely one of the best tacos ever. Both are from the Americano concessionaire.
After, we tried their pastries and got the Fruit SaladFiestang Pinoy, the Mango Sago, and the Walnut Brownie. The Fruit Salad was different because it had cheese strips on top. My brother liked it, I did not. It costs Php70.
The Mango Sago which was also Php70 was a bit lacking in sweetness in my opinion as well.
The runaway winner I would have to say is the Walnut Brownie, Php120. It may sound expensive but trust me, it is worth every peso you spend on it. The amount of walnuts, the texture of the chocolate, and the overall combination of everything was simply STUPENDUOUS.
Thank you to my little brother for the treat. It was AWESOME!
They currently have 6 food places that you can choose from. Sapporo which is for the Japanese cuisine, Pan Asian for Indian and Mediterranean food, Hong Kong, Chicken Licken which is all about chicken, Americano and then the Pattiserie.
We tried the American this time and it was oh so worth it. The chili dog which is only Php175 is definitely worth every peso. I definitely enjoyed it and though I ate only half, I was feeling full already.
We also had the Nachos which is Php120 only and it was really filling as well. I also loved that they did not scrimp on the toppings. Definitely one of the best tacos ever. Both are from the Americano concessionaire.
After, we tried their pastries and got the Fruit SaladFiestang Pinoy, the Mango Sago, and the Walnut Brownie. The Fruit Salad was different because it had cheese strips on top. My brother liked it, I did not. It costs Php70.
The Mango Sago which was also Php70 was a bit lacking in sweetness in my opinion as well.
The runaway winner I would have to say is the Walnut Brownie, Php120. It may sound expensive but trust me, it is worth every peso you spend on it. The amount of walnuts, the texture of the chocolate, and the overall combination of everything was simply STUPENDUOUS.
Thank you to my little brother for the treat. It was AWESOME!
Apartment 1B
I have always wanted to try the food at Apartment 1B. For several reasons though, it took more than 3 years before I was able to do so. Luckily, today broke that unlucky streak when it came to Apartment 1B. Today, this greeted me for brunch.
Upon entering the place, the coziness of it is what would hit you first. You won't feel that you are in an upscale restaurant that is intent on intimidating you. Instead, you will feel that you are at home, albeit, a classy home.
My brother ordered the Croque Madame which is a a traditional Croque Monsieur served with a fried egg and a bit of Béchamel sauce spooned over the finished sandwich.
I on the other hand had the Eggs Benedict with Smoked Salmon and Spinach. It is an American breakfast dish that consists of two halves of an English muffin, topped with ham or bacon, poached eggs, and Hollandaise sauce.
Our other companions had the Apartment 1B Breakfast and the Egg Breakfast respectively. By the way they finished off their plate, I'd say they loved it just as much as my brother and I loved what we ordered.
The main thing I really loved about the food there was that it tasted like a home cooked meal but with a bit of panache. It was classy but cozy. It's just the feeling that I got when I bit into the food. Oh, and the potatoes need to have their own place in the menu. Yes, it was that good.
We also ordered 4 kinds of dessert and everything was just right. The crepe gateau was velvety, the flourless cake was creamy, the cheesecake just the right hint of cheese, and the frozen pie was absolutely perfect especially with the sprinkling of walnuts.
Apartment 1B
Address: One Lafayette Square
G/F Unit 1-B One Lafayette Square, 132 Sedeno St Salcedo Village, Makati
(02) 843-4075
Upon entering the place, the coziness of it is what would hit you first. You won't feel that you are in an upscale restaurant that is intent on intimidating you. Instead, you will feel that you are at home, albeit, a classy home.
My brother ordered the Croque Madame which is a a traditional Croque Monsieur served with a fried egg and a bit of Béchamel sauce spooned over the finished sandwich.
 |
| Croque Madame Php530 |
 |
| Eggs Benedict with Smoked Salmon Php470 |
The main thing I really loved about the food there was that it tasted like a home cooked meal but with a bit of panache. It was classy but cozy. It's just the feeling that I got when I bit into the food. Oh, and the potatoes need to have their own place in the menu. Yes, it was that good.
We also ordered 4 kinds of dessert and everything was just right. The crepe gateau was velvety, the flourless cake was creamy, the cheesecake just the right hint of cheese, and the frozen pie was absolutely perfect especially with the sprinkling of walnuts.
 |
| Frozen Pie |
 |
| White Toblerone CheeseCake |
 |
| Flourless Chocolate Cake with Vanilla Ice Cream |
 |
| Crepe Gateau |
It was a brunch that was very much filling. We actually stayed way past the original time we allotted to ourselves because the place just felt like you were at home, hanging out with your friends. It felt like home; one wherein they served gourmet comfort food.
Apartment 1B
Address: One Lafayette Square
G/F Unit 1-B One Lafayette Square, 132 Sedeno St Salcedo Village, Makati
(02) 843-4075
in another life ...
This post is inspired by the song of Katy Perry called "The One that Got Away." I heard its acoustic version and simply fell for it.
In another life, you would still be here. You would have celebrated my Lola's birthday with us, most likely with the kids in tow since tomorrow is a holiday.
In another life, you would have patched things up with me last April 16 and not have said, "I think you already know we're breaking up." on the same day that my Dad let go of me from work and my Mom had an operation.
In another life, you would have sat me down way back January when things started to really fall apart and told me that we had a problem and since you really wanted to spend the future with me, we need to talk and sort things out one issue at a time.
In another life, I would have been able to forget about the lies and broken promises. I would have been able to keep it together and not fallen apart when I worked for my Dad. I would have been what you wanted me to be, that always happy girlfriend you kept envisioning in your head.
In another life, we would have helped each other instead of destroying each other. I would have seen the signs and you would have seen it too. We would have been able to patch the holes and fix things before it truly fell apart.
In another life, we would have kept our promises to each other. There would have been no lies, no broken promises, no hurting, no heartbreak. We would have been true to each other.
In another life, when I believed that you truly loved me, you wouldn't have walked away. You would not have turned your back on me or asked me to stay away from you. You would have held my hand and told me that we will work on things together.
In another life, I wouldn't be writing this post. I wouldn't be shedding tears when I heard this song last night because these lines speak of what I wanted to stay.
In another life, you would be my boy, we'd keep all our promise, be us against the world. In another life, I would make you stay, so I don't have to say you are the one that got away, the one that got away.
In another life, you would still be here. You would have celebrated my Lola's birthday with us, most likely with the kids in tow since tomorrow is a holiday.
In another life, you would have patched things up with me last April 16 and not have said, "I think you already know we're breaking up." on the same day that my Dad let go of me from work and my Mom had an operation.
In another life, you would have sat me down way back January when things started to really fall apart and told me that we had a problem and since you really wanted to spend the future with me, we need to talk and sort things out one issue at a time.
In another life, I would have been able to forget about the lies and broken promises. I would have been able to keep it together and not fallen apart when I worked for my Dad. I would have been what you wanted me to be, that always happy girlfriend you kept envisioning in your head.
In another life, we would have helped each other instead of destroying each other. I would have seen the signs and you would have seen it too. We would have been able to patch the holes and fix things before it truly fell apart.
In another life, we would have kept our promises to each other. There would have been no lies, no broken promises, no hurting, no heartbreak. We would have been true to each other.
In another life, when I believed that you truly loved me, you wouldn't have walked away. You would not have turned your back on me or asked me to stay away from you. You would have held my hand and told me that we will work on things together.
In another life, I wouldn't be writing this post. I wouldn't be shedding tears when I heard this song last night because these lines speak of what I wanted to stay.
In another life, you would be my boy, we'd keep all our promise, be us against the world. In another life, I would make you stay, so I don't have to say you are the one that got away, the one that got away.
Sunday, August 25, 2013
money isn't everything
First of all, I have been poor. I don't mean squatter poor or Payatas poor but I have gone through a phase or months in my life where I wondered where I would get the money for the next meal. I have gone through a day with only pansit canton to tide me over the whole day and I was 7 months pregnant. Obviously, it wasn't enough nutrition but it was the only thing that I could afford that time.
I started with that to set the premise that I have been at that point where I had no money so I know how it feels to have money. I have also been to that point where I can buy a few luxuries here and there. I have an idea of what the two sides of the story are.
Still, I say, and I mean this with all my heart, money isn't everything. You can have all the money in the world and still be miserable and lonely. You can have just the right amount that you need to be comfortable and be truly happy.
I am aiming for the latter.
I do not need a lot of money. I have never wanted a lot of money. I just want to have a bit more than enough to have a comfortable life for B and I. My dream house is one of those two storey 2 bedroom lots in Camella.
Yes, my dream is that simple compared to those who want a house that has 5 bedrooms, a garden, garage, swimming pool, lanai and the like. I just want that simple house.
Earlier I was talking to someone and I told this person someone offered to buy me a DSLR in New York and that person will ship it here. She told me that she'd smack me if I decline. I said I did already. She told me that I have been like this ever since and nothing has come out of my life. She said that in this life, money ranks really high and that to have a lot of it is good.
I replied that I can make my own money and so I don't need someone else to buy me the camera. I can save for it and then buy it. I said that I earn my own money. She said, "really? And look at you."
I was hurt. I was really hurt. Granted that I am nowhere being rich but I make do. I am still able to give a few luxuries to my son and take him out from time to time. I am able to send him to a private school. I am able to support his immediate needs.
I do all this with money that I make and work hard for. I wade through floods, sit for 3 hours on a bus ride just to get to work.
I work hard and I earn MY OWN MONEY. I EARN IT.
I was so hurt that she just belittled it. I was also disappointed that she now thinks that way. Part of me understands why she's become so focused with money but a part of me longs for that person she used to be; the one who would work hard to make her own money.
I hope that I never lose my desire to earn my own money and buy things for myself. Yes, it feels good to receive lavish gifts but it also feels damn good when you buy something for yourself.
I would know. Everytime I look at my iPOD, my camera, my headphones, and my new bag, I feel damn good. They may be pricey but I worked my ass off to buy them.
I will always choose to make my own money than have it simply handed to me. It's the best way to ensure you will always be grateful for things around you.
I started with that to set the premise that I have been at that point where I had no money so I know how it feels to have money. I have also been to that point where I can buy a few luxuries here and there. I have an idea of what the two sides of the story are.
Still, I say, and I mean this with all my heart, money isn't everything. You can have all the money in the world and still be miserable and lonely. You can have just the right amount that you need to be comfortable and be truly happy.
I am aiming for the latter.
I do not need a lot of money. I have never wanted a lot of money. I just want to have a bit more than enough to have a comfortable life for B and I. My dream house is one of those two storey 2 bedroom lots in Camella.
Yes, my dream is that simple compared to those who want a house that has 5 bedrooms, a garden, garage, swimming pool, lanai and the like. I just want that simple house.
Earlier I was talking to someone and I told this person someone offered to buy me a DSLR in New York and that person will ship it here. She told me that she'd smack me if I decline. I said I did already. She told me that I have been like this ever since and nothing has come out of my life. She said that in this life, money ranks really high and that to have a lot of it is good.
I replied that I can make my own money and so I don't need someone else to buy me the camera. I can save for it and then buy it. I said that I earn my own money. She said, "really? And look at you."
I was hurt. I was really hurt. Granted that I am nowhere being rich but I make do. I am still able to give a few luxuries to my son and take him out from time to time. I am able to send him to a private school. I am able to support his immediate needs.
I do all this with money that I make and work hard for. I wade through floods, sit for 3 hours on a bus ride just to get to work.
I work hard and I earn MY OWN MONEY. I EARN IT.
I was so hurt that she just belittled it. I was also disappointed that she now thinks that way. Part of me understands why she's become so focused with money but a part of me longs for that person she used to be; the one who would work hard to make her own money.
I hope that I never lose my desire to earn my own money and buy things for myself. Yes, it feels good to receive lavish gifts but it also feels damn good when you buy something for yourself.
I would know. Everytime I look at my iPOD, my camera, my headphones, and my new bag, I feel damn good. They may be pricey but I worked my ass off to buy them.
I will always choose to make my own money than have it simply handed to me. It's the best way to ensure you will always be grateful for things around you.
Saturday, August 24, 2013
LOVE: This is Not Yet a Musical
Since I am one of the contributors for this SUPER GENIUS OF A PLAY, please do watch it! Please? I'll be attending the September 1 screening so kitakits! Eeekkk!
LOVE: This is Not Yet a Musical or LOVENot is the first original devised work by Sipat Lawin Ensemble. This is our present-day myth about love and its manifestation in our everyday life based on our collective consciousness.
Open DTR / Blank-Ticketed Night: August 23 (Fri)
Show Dates: August 25 (Sun)
August 29-30 (Thurs-Fri)
Sept 1-2 (Sun-Mon)
Time: 8:00PM
Venue: Patio Jose Resort, #8 Matahimk St., cor. V.Luna, Quezon City
Ticket Price: P500 Regular; P350 Student; P400 (Pre-selling via BDO Deposit)
Check out our event page on FB: https://www.facebook.com/
LOVE: This is Not Yet a Musical or LOVENot is the first original devised work by Sipat Lawin Ensemble. This is our present-day myth about love and its manifestation in our everyday life based on our collective consciousness.
Open DTR / Blank-Ticketed Night: August 23 (Fri)
Show Dates: August 25 (Sun)
August 29-30 (Thurs-Fri)
Sept 1-2 (Sun-Mon)
Time: 8:00PM
Venue: Patio Jose Resort, #8 Matahimk St., cor. V.Luna, Quezon City
Ticket Price: P500 Regular; P350 Student; P400 (Pre-selling via BDO Deposit)
Check out our event page on FB: https://www.facebook.com/
Friday, August 23, 2013
bonding at BullChef
It was a spur of the moment kind of thing. There were absolutely no plans of going out but someone mentioned going to BullChef and the next thing I knew, I found myself saying yes. What was most surprising was the company that JJ and I went with.
We went with two coworkers, one of whom used to hate my guts. Lately though, we have started a friendship after clearing things up and I love how the night turned out.
We had the Group Package which was good for 4-6 people and it was simply delicious. What I enjoyed the most was that they actually reallv loved the food. It has been a long time since I have been with people who just enjoy the food I recommended and they definitely enjoyed it.
I loved how the night simply went from good to amazing. It was enjoyable and there were lots of laughter. Great food and great company = a wonderful dinner.
Thank you BullChef for serving really great food. My friends and I had a lot of fun and enjoyed every bite.
# 4 East Capitol Drive, Barangay Kapitolyo, Pasig City, Metro Manila
Open Monday - Sunday
11am - 12am
Twitter: @wearebullchef
We went with two coworkers, one of whom used to hate my guts. Lately though, we have started a friendship after clearing things up and I love how the night turned out.
We had the Group Package which was good for 4-6 people and it was simply delicious. What I enjoyed the most was that they actually reallv loved the food. It has been a long time since I have been with people who just enjoy the food I recommended and they definitely enjoyed it.
I loved how the night simply went from good to amazing. It was enjoyable and there were lots of laughter. Great food and great company = a wonderful dinner.
Thank you BullChef for serving really great food. My friends and I had a lot of fun and enjoyed every bite.
# 4 East Capitol Drive, Barangay Kapitolyo, Pasig City, Metro Manila
Open Monday - Sunday
11am - 12am
Twitter: @wearebullchef
Thursday, August 22, 2013
My advice after a divorce following 16 years of marriage by Gerald Rogers
For the men who have fallen in love ...
For the men who have fallen out of love ...
For the men who no longer wants to love ....
For the men who still is in love ...
For those who are in a relationship ...
For those who want to get out of the relationship ....
For those who are out of it and don't know if they should get back in ...
For those who are getting married ...
For those who are married ....
For those who are going through an annulment or divorce ...
For those who have been annulled or divorce ...
For those who still believe in love ...
For those who might no longer believe in love ...
PLEASE READ THIS. #8 and #20 are for me the most important.
My advice after a divorce following 16 years of marriage, by Gerald Rogers.
Obviously, I’m not a relationship expert. But there’s something about my divorce being finalized this week that gives me perspective of things I wish I would have done different… After losing a woman that I loved, and a marriage of almost 16 years, here’s the advice I wish I would have had
1. Never stop courting. Never stop dating. NEVER EVER take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you promised to be that man that would OWN HER HEART and to fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. SHE CHOSE YOU. Never forget that, and NEVER GET LAZY in your love.
2. Protect your own heart. Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.
3. Fall in love over and over again. You will constantly change. You’re not the same people you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, and in that you have to re-choose each other everyday. SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU, and if you don’t take care of her heart, she may give that heart to someone else or seal you out completely, and you may never be able to get it back. Always fight to win her love just as you did when you were courting her.
4. Always see the best in her. Focus only on what you love. What you focus on will expand. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged. If you focus on what you love, you can’t help but be consumed by love. Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love, and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to be have this woman as your wife.
5. It’s not your job to change or fix her… your job is to love her as she is with no expectation of her ever changing. And if she changes, love what she becomes, whether it’s what you wanted or not.
6. Take full accountability for your own emotions: It’s not your wife’s job to make you happy, and she CAN’T make you sad. You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your joy will spill over into your relationship and your love.
7. Never blame your wife if you get frustrated or angry at her, it is only because it is triggering something inside of YOU. They are YOUR emotions, and your responsibility. When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of YOU that is asking to be healed. You were attracted to this woman because she was the person best suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds in the most painful way so that you could heal them… when you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by her, and you will wonder why you ever were.
8. Allow your woman to just be. When she’s sad or upset, it’s not your job to fix it, it’s your job to HOLD HER and let her know it’s ok. Let her know that you hear her, and that she’s important and that you are that pillar on which she can always lean. The feminine spirit is about change and emotion and like a storm her emotions will roll in and out, and as you remain strong and unjudging she will trust you and open her soul to you… DON’T RUN-AWAY WHEN SHE’S UPSET. Stand present and strong and let her know you aren’t going anywhere. Listen to what she is really saying behind the words and emotion.
9. Be silly… don’t take yourself so damn seriously. Laugh. And make her laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier.
10. Fill her soul everyday… learn her love languages and the specific ways that she feels important and validated and CHERISHED. Ask her to create a list of 10 THINGS that make her feel loved and memorize those things and make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a queen.
11. Be present. Give her not only your time, but your focus, your attention and your soul. Do whatever it takes to clear your head so that when you are with her you are fully WITH HER. Treat her as you would your most valuable client. She is.
12. Be willing to take her sexually, to carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul. Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully.
13. Don’t be an idiot…. And don’t be afraid of being one either. You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too big of mistakes, and learn from the ones you do make. You’re not supposed to be perfect, just try to not be too stupid.
14. Give her space… The woman is so good at giving and giving, and sometimes she will need to be reminded to take time to nurture herself. Sometimes she will need to fly from your branches to go and find what feeds her soul, and if you give her that space she will come back with new songs to sing…. (okay, getting a little too poetic here, but you get the point. Tell her to take time for herself, ESPECIALLY after you have kids. She needs that space to renew and get re-centered, and to find herself after she gets lost in serving you, the kids and the world.)
15. Be vulnerable… you don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes.
16. Be fully transparent. If you want to have trust you must be willing to share EVERYTHING… Especially those things you don’t want to share. It takes courage to fully love, to fully open your heart and let her in when you don’t know i she will like what she finds… Part of that courage is allowing her to love you completely, your darkness as well as your light. DROP THE MASK… If you feel like you need to wear a mask around her, and show up perfect all the time, you will never experience the full dimension of what love can be.
17. Never stop growing together… The stagnant pond breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool. Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it is if you stop working on your relationship. Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards.
18. Don’t worry about money. Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to win it. It never helps when teammates fight. Figure out ways to leverage both persons strength to win.
19. Forgive immediately and focus on the future rather than carrying weight from the past. Don’t let your history hold you hostage. Holding onto past mistakes that either you or she makes, is like a heavy anchor to your marriage and will hold you back. FORGIVENESS IS FREEDOM. Cut the anchor loose and always choose love.
20. Always choose love. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. In the end, this is the only advice you need. If this is the guiding principle through which all your choices is governed, there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Love will always endure.
In the end marriage isn’t about happily ever after. It’s about work. And a commitment to grow together and a willingness to continually invest in creating something that can endure eternity. Through that work, the happiness will come. Marriage is life, and it will bring ups and downs. Embracing all of the cycles and learning to learn from and love each experience will bring the strength and perspective to keep building, one brick at a time.
These are lessons I learned the hard way. These are lessons I learned too late. But these are lessons I am learning and committed in carrying forward. Truth is, I loved being married, and in time, I will get married again, and when I do, I will build it with a foundation that will endure any storm and any amount of time.
If you are reading this and find wisdom in my pain, share it those those young husbands whose hearts are still full of hope, and with those couples you may know who may have forgotten how to love. One of those men may be like I was, and in these hard earned lessons perhaps something will awaken in him and he will learn to be the man his lady has been waiting for.
MEN- THIS IS YOUR CHARGE: Commit to being an EPIC LOVER. There is no greater challenge, and no greater prize. Your woman deserves that from. Be the type of husband your wife can’t help but brag about.
For the men who have fallen out of love ...
For the men who no longer wants to love ....
For the men who still is in love ...
For those who are in a relationship ...
For those who want to get out of the relationship ....
For those who are out of it and don't know if they should get back in ...
For those who are getting married ...
For those who are married ....
For those who are going through an annulment or divorce ...
For those who have been annulled or divorce ...
For those who still believe in love ...
For those who might no longer believe in love ...
PLEASE READ THIS. #8 and #20 are for me the most important.
My advice after a divorce following 16 years of marriage, by Gerald Rogers.
Obviously, I’m not a relationship expert. But there’s something about my divorce being finalized this week that gives me perspective of things I wish I would have done different… After losing a woman that I loved, and a marriage of almost 16 years, here’s the advice I wish I would have had
1. Never stop courting. Never stop dating. NEVER EVER take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you promised to be that man that would OWN HER HEART and to fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. SHE CHOSE YOU. Never forget that, and NEVER GET LAZY in your love.
2. Protect your own heart. Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.
3. Fall in love over and over again. You will constantly change. You’re not the same people you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, and in that you have to re-choose each other everyday. SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU, and if you don’t take care of her heart, she may give that heart to someone else or seal you out completely, and you may never be able to get it back. Always fight to win her love just as you did when you were courting her.
4. Always see the best in her. Focus only on what you love. What you focus on will expand. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged. If you focus on what you love, you can’t help but be consumed by love. Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love, and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to be have this woman as your wife.
5. It’s not your job to change or fix her… your job is to love her as she is with no expectation of her ever changing. And if she changes, love what she becomes, whether it’s what you wanted or not.
6. Take full accountability for your own emotions: It’s not your wife’s job to make you happy, and she CAN’T make you sad. You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your joy will spill over into your relationship and your love.
7. Never blame your wife if you get frustrated or angry at her, it is only because it is triggering something inside of YOU. They are YOUR emotions, and your responsibility. When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of YOU that is asking to be healed. You were attracted to this woman because she was the person best suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds in the most painful way so that you could heal them… when you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by her, and you will wonder why you ever were.
8. Allow your woman to just be. When she’s sad or upset, it’s not your job to fix it, it’s your job to HOLD HER and let her know it’s ok. Let her know that you hear her, and that she’s important and that you are that pillar on which she can always lean. The feminine spirit is about change and emotion and like a storm her emotions will roll in and out, and as you remain strong and unjudging she will trust you and open her soul to you… DON’T RUN-AWAY WHEN SHE’S UPSET. Stand present and strong and let her know you aren’t going anywhere. Listen to what she is really saying behind the words and emotion.
9. Be silly… don’t take yourself so damn seriously. Laugh. And make her laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier.
10. Fill her soul everyday… learn her love languages and the specific ways that she feels important and validated and CHERISHED. Ask her to create a list of 10 THINGS that make her feel loved and memorize those things and make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a queen.
11. Be present. Give her not only your time, but your focus, your attention and your soul. Do whatever it takes to clear your head so that when you are with her you are fully WITH HER. Treat her as you would your most valuable client. She is.
12. Be willing to take her sexually, to carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul. Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully.
13. Don’t be an idiot…. And don’t be afraid of being one either. You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too big of mistakes, and learn from the ones you do make. You’re not supposed to be perfect, just try to not be too stupid.
14. Give her space… The woman is so good at giving and giving, and sometimes she will need to be reminded to take time to nurture herself. Sometimes she will need to fly from your branches to go and find what feeds her soul, and if you give her that space she will come back with new songs to sing…. (okay, getting a little too poetic here, but you get the point. Tell her to take time for herself, ESPECIALLY after you have kids. She needs that space to renew and get re-centered, and to find herself after she gets lost in serving you, the kids and the world.)
15. Be vulnerable… you don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes.
16. Be fully transparent. If you want to have trust you must be willing to share EVERYTHING… Especially those things you don’t want to share. It takes courage to fully love, to fully open your heart and let her in when you don’t know i she will like what she finds… Part of that courage is allowing her to love you completely, your darkness as well as your light. DROP THE MASK… If you feel like you need to wear a mask around her, and show up perfect all the time, you will never experience the full dimension of what love can be.
17. Never stop growing together… The stagnant pond breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool. Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it is if you stop working on your relationship. Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards.
18. Don’t worry about money. Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to win it. It never helps when teammates fight. Figure out ways to leverage both persons strength to win.
19. Forgive immediately and focus on the future rather than carrying weight from the past. Don’t let your history hold you hostage. Holding onto past mistakes that either you or she makes, is like a heavy anchor to your marriage and will hold you back. FORGIVENESS IS FREEDOM. Cut the anchor loose and always choose love.
20. Always choose love. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. In the end, this is the only advice you need. If this is the guiding principle through which all your choices is governed, there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Love will always endure.
In the end marriage isn’t about happily ever after. It’s about work. And a commitment to grow together and a willingness to continually invest in creating something that can endure eternity. Through that work, the happiness will come. Marriage is life, and it will bring ups and downs. Embracing all of the cycles and learning to learn from and love each experience will bring the strength and perspective to keep building, one brick at a time.
These are lessons I learned the hard way. These are lessons I learned too late. But these are lessons I am learning and committed in carrying forward. Truth is, I loved being married, and in time, I will get married again, and when I do, I will build it with a foundation that will endure any storm and any amount of time.
If you are reading this and find wisdom in my pain, share it those those young husbands whose hearts are still full of hope, and with those couples you may know who may have forgotten how to love. One of those men may be like I was, and in these hard earned lessons perhaps something will awaken in him and he will learn to be the man his lady has been waiting for.
MEN- THIS IS YOUR CHARGE: Commit to being an EPIC LOVER. There is no greater challenge, and no greater prize. Your woman deserves that from. Be the type of husband your wife can’t help but brag about.
Wooden Spoon
JJ and I had been planning to go have dinner at Wooden Spoon since last week. However, due to some unforeseen events (her lovelife got resurrected and then I had to meet a friend,) it didn't push through until earlier tonight. Even with the possible rain, I decided that we should just go ahead and do it since it might not push through anymore if we kept delaying it.
Thankfully, my decision proved to be right. Wooden Spoon is hole in the wall resto owned by Chef Sandy Daza. It's located across Miriam College in Katipunan.
The interiors were quite simple but had a homey feel to it.
JJ and I ordered the Fiesta Rice Php155 which was good for 2-3 persons, the Adobo Flakes Php195, and the Wooden Spoon Crispy Chicken Php195.
The Fiesta Rice was a bit salty but not too salty. For someone who is not a fan of salty things, I actually liked their Fiesta Rice and how the tomato, salted egg, smoked fish, and Chinese chorizo all blended. It was definitely something worth trying.
The Adobo Flakes were pretty good as well. I've actually learned to not like this as it has always been disappointing but thankfully, this time I was wrong. It was crispy and flakey. It had taste even in the smallest strips.
The Wooden Spoon Crispy Chicken was another revelation. It was crispy on the outside but definitely soft on the inside. We actually finished the entire plate. It was cooked the Korean Way and can definitely give Smopers or even Bon Chon a run for their money.
The pandan crepe is hands down the winner of the night. Its a pandan crepe filled with local ice cream sprinkled with chocolate syrup and topped with pinipig plus spicy peanuts. Yes, you read that right. SPICY peanuts. The blend of the sweetness and creaminess of the ice cream plus the chocolate drizzle and pinipig along with hints of spice was just AWESOME! It was definitely something different but in a really good way.
I LOVED IT!
Thank you JJ for this wonderful treat. It was truly worth the travel and I'm simply thankful that though I was boring at first, you stayed and became my friend. :)
Thankfully, my decision proved to be right. Wooden Spoon is hole in the wall resto owned by Chef Sandy Daza. It's located across Miriam College in Katipunan.
The interiors were quite simple but had a homey feel to it.
JJ and I ordered the Fiesta Rice Php155 which was good for 2-3 persons, the Adobo Flakes Php195, and the Wooden Spoon Crispy Chicken Php195.
The Fiesta Rice was a bit salty but not too salty. For someone who is not a fan of salty things, I actually liked their Fiesta Rice and how the tomato, salted egg, smoked fish, and Chinese chorizo all blended. It was definitely something worth trying.
The Adobo Flakes were pretty good as well. I've actually learned to not like this as it has always been disappointing but thankfully, this time I was wrong. It was crispy and flakey. It had taste even in the smallest strips.
The Wooden Spoon Crispy Chicken was another revelation. It was crispy on the outside but definitely soft on the inside. We actually finished the entire plate. It was cooked the Korean Way and can definitely give Smopers or even Bon Chon a run for their money.
The pandan crepe is hands down the winner of the night. Its a pandan crepe filled with local ice cream sprinkled with chocolate syrup and topped with pinipig plus spicy peanuts. Yes, you read that right. SPICY peanuts. The blend of the sweetness and creaminess of the ice cream plus the chocolate drizzle and pinipig along with hints of spice was just AWESOME! It was definitely something different but in a really good way.
I LOVED IT!
Thank you JJ for this wonderful treat. It was truly worth the travel and I'm simply thankful that though I was boring at first, you stayed and became my friend. :)
Monday, August 19, 2013
Emergency Numbers
Have it on your phone. Print and laminate. Spread and give it out to neighbors.
It CAN save lives.
It CAN save lives.
Info about the Starbucks Card
Since a friend of mine asked me questions about the Starbucks Card, I realized that I really didn't give much information on the first post that I did so here goes.
What is a Starbucks Card?
The Starbucks Card is a stored value card as well as a loyalty card that offers you rewards when making purchases at any Starbucks store in the Philippines. It also makes a perfect gift for any occasion.
Why did Starbucks introduce the Starbucks Card?
It’s just our way of saying thanks for being a loyal Starbucks customer! If we can enhance your Starbucks experience with the rewards of using the Starbucks Card, then we’re doing our job right.
How do I purchase a Starbucks Card?
You can activate a Starbucks Card at any Starbucks store in the Philippines with an initial minimum load of just Php300. The amount will be loaded into your Starbucks Card which you can use to make purchase right away. There are no Card, set up, or usage fees.
Can I purchase a Starbucks Card in the Philippines and use it in another country?
The Starbucks Card in the Philippines is a locally issued Card and can only be used in the Philippines. We are also unable to perform any transactions, including reloading, on another country’s Starbucks Cards.
Is a Starbucks Card re-loadable?
Yes, reloads can be done at any participating Starbucks store in the Philippines. Only denominations of Php100 are accepted for reloads and a maximum amount of Php10,000 is permitted on the account at any one time.
Can I reuse my Starbucks Card?
Definitely! Your Starbucks Cards is re-loadable and re-useable. You can reload your Starbucks Card with additional cash value at any of our participating Starbucks stores in the Philippines.
Is there an expiry date for my Starbucks Card?
Your Starbucks Card will not expire so long as you keep using your Card and have available load. Only Cards with no activity and load will expire 3 years from the last purchase.
Can I return or refund a Starbucks Card that I have purchased or received as gift?
No. All Starbucks Cards purchased or received are non-refundable nor exchangeable for cash.
Is there a limit to the number of Starbucks Card I can purchase?
There is no limit to the number of Cards you can purchase provided each Card is loaded with a minimum of Php300 upon activation. We can however limit your purchase to 10 Starbucks Cards per transaction.
Here's how my Starbucks Card Online Account look like.
Hope this helps. :)
To register. go to http://www.starbucks.ph/
What is a Starbucks Card?
The Starbucks Card is a stored value card as well as a loyalty card that offers you rewards when making purchases at any Starbucks store in the Philippines. It also makes a perfect gift for any occasion.
Why did Starbucks introduce the Starbucks Card?
It’s just our way of saying thanks for being a loyal Starbucks customer! If we can enhance your Starbucks experience with the rewards of using the Starbucks Card, then we’re doing our job right.
How do I purchase a Starbucks Card?
You can activate a Starbucks Card at any Starbucks store in the Philippines with an initial minimum load of just Php300. The amount will be loaded into your Starbucks Card which you can use to make purchase right away. There are no Card, set up, or usage fees.
Can I purchase a Starbucks Card in the Philippines and use it in another country?
The Starbucks Card in the Philippines is a locally issued Card and can only be used in the Philippines. We are also unable to perform any transactions, including reloading, on another country’s Starbucks Cards.
Is a Starbucks Card re-loadable?
Yes, reloads can be done at any participating Starbucks store in the Philippines. Only denominations of Php100 are accepted for reloads and a maximum amount of Php10,000 is permitted on the account at any one time.
Can I reuse my Starbucks Card?
Definitely! Your Starbucks Cards is re-loadable and re-useable. You can reload your Starbucks Card with additional cash value at any of our participating Starbucks stores in the Philippines.
Is there an expiry date for my Starbucks Card?
Your Starbucks Card will not expire so long as you keep using your Card and have available load. Only Cards with no activity and load will expire 3 years from the last purchase.
Can I return or refund a Starbucks Card that I have purchased or received as gift?
No. All Starbucks Cards purchased or received are non-refundable nor exchangeable for cash.
Is there a limit to the number of Starbucks Card I can purchase?
There is no limit to the number of Cards you can purchase provided each Card is loaded with a minimum of Php300 upon activation. We can however limit your purchase to 10 Starbucks Cards per transaction.
Here's how my Starbucks Card Online Account look like.
Hope this helps. :)
To register. go to http://www.starbucks.ph/
Sunday, August 18, 2013
Neil's Birthday Treat at Packo's
They have been trying to get me to hangout at Timog for over a month now. I've always said no because I live in the South and that was just too far for me. Besides, it will be at night and I didn't want to stay out too late.
I know, I know. What a dud right? Well, its not my fault that I've always preferred dinner, movie, and coffee over drinking. I mean, I have days where I'd want to drink but this can always be superseded by invitation of a decent dinner or coffee. I guess I'm boring that way.
Anyway, last night, since it was my good friend Neil's birthday, I decided to go ahead and meet them at Packo's in Timog. Luckily, a coworker took me there so I didn't even have to commute. Yey!
Thankfully, Jackie was also present and the others in the group made me feel welcome when I got there. It was nice seeing old friends and making new ones.
Being with the Chinese community again last night felt good. It felt like I was back in familiar territory. It was something that I was familiar with. It felt good.
Happy birthday Neil. I know that things are a bit tough but as you said, it will get better. Everything always does.
I know, I know. What a dud right? Well, its not my fault that I've always preferred dinner, movie, and coffee over drinking. I mean, I have days where I'd want to drink but this can always be superseded by invitation of a decent dinner or coffee. I guess I'm boring that way.
Anyway, last night, since it was my good friend Neil's birthday, I decided to go ahead and meet them at Packo's in Timog. Luckily, a coworker took me there so I didn't even have to commute. Yey!
Thankfully, Jackie was also present and the others in the group made me feel welcome when I got there. It was nice seeing old friends and making new ones.
Being with the Chinese community again last night felt good. It felt like I was back in familiar territory. It was something that I was familiar with. It felt good.
Happy birthday Neil. I know that things are a bit tough but as you said, it will get better. Everything always does.
Press Preview: Alice in Wonderland
I was fortunate enough to once again be invited to the press preview for another amazing play, this time by Repertory Philippines, Alice in Wonderland.
In celebration of its 21st year of producing well-loved musicals for children of all ages, Repertory Philippine's Theater for Young Audiences proudly presents its 2013 offering witht the staging of Alice in Wonderland.
The show is a definite feast for the eyes and ears. The costumes are magnificent and wonderfully detailed. The music, very lively and it sticks to you and replays itself in your head over and over again. The actors, brilliant.
I'm sure any kid or those who are kids at heart will enjoy watching this. It opened yesterday, August 17 and will run until December 15, 2013 at Onstage, 2F, Greenbelt 1, Paseo de roxas corner Legazpi Street, Makati City.
For reservations for schools, civic groups, and corporate sponsorships, please call 571-6926 and 571-4941. You can also email shows@repertoryphilippines.com or visit www.repertoryphilippines.com
Tickets are also available through Ticketworld 891-9999 or www.ticketworld.com.ph
See you at the theater.
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