Monday, September 28, 2009

and that's not global warming?

In a span of 6 hours, my country experienced rainfall that was worth a month's rain. No one was prepared for this since the storm signal given to us was just signal number 1. Even I was hoping to go out last Saturday to chill and relax at Starbucks. Thankfully, my excitement to watch season premieres got the better of me and I stayed home. Thank God for that.

I am amazed that there are still people who do not believe in global warming. This is extreme climate change already. The devastation we suffered is not even anywhere near laughable and we Pinoy's can laugh at anything. I hope people realize the intensity of this. This is our wake up call. We use to feel good when we hear the rain pouring outside and we imagine hot cups of coffee or chocolate. Now, we cringe and worry that it might be another typhoon Ondoy.

Think about it. Think about that. Think about this.
this is a tunnel ... now the tunnel is gone and its just flood water

Sunday, September 27, 2009

today, everything changed

Today, everything I believed in crumpled and shattered into tiny little pieces. Everything that I believe in, hoped for, and prayed for, all gone in one swift move. I shall no longer believe. Enough is enough. I gambled and lost. I accept it.

Today, everything changed and I will never be the same again.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

state of calamity for a storm signal number 1

What is happening to the Philippines? To the world? To the weather?

TYPHOON AFFECTED AREAS IN MANILA: For people who need assistance: National Disaster Coordinating Council (NDCC) Emergency Numbers: 632912-5668, 632911-1406, 632912-2665, 632911-5061. Help hotlines: 632734-2118, 632734-2120.

holding on or letting go

A quote I love from Bob Ong (a Filipino author) is this: "Pakawalan mo ung mga bagay na nakakasakit sayo kahit na pinasasaya ka nito. Wag mong hintayin ang araw na sakit na lang ang nararamdaman mo at iniwan ka na ng kasiyahan mo."

In English: "Let go of the things that causes you pain even if it also brings you happiness. Do not wait for the time when it will just bring you pain because your happiness has left."

I am a firm follower of holding on until there is nothing left to hold on to anymore. This is what I normally do and have always done whenever I am in any relationship, be it love or friendship. It is just not in me to let go when there is still something.

However, if you and the other person are not on the same page of the things you want to happen, or how you want things to be, what do you do about it? What if the other person is willing to compromise everything on his side and do what you want him to do but you know that it doesn't make him happy? What if your demands are not over the line but simply something that can be easily met and very reasonable? Do you give way and just keep all the bad feelings inside or do you let the other person adjust but at the same time risk losing everything? Either way, it seems that the end will be the same.

What do you do? Do you pray that things work out or do you compromise and sacrifice to maintain things? Do you hold on or do you let go?

Thursday, September 24, 2009


the back of their jacket
required family picture

the twins at the airport posing with their paddles and jacket

the airport hehe
So the twins are now in China to compete in the World Dragonboat Competition. YEY TEAM! GO TEAM PILIPINAS! I hope they win. Most of all, I hope they bring me a citymug. Hahahahahaha!

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

the best that I can be

Yesterday, I cried like I haven't cried in a long time. I cried because someone who mattered to me hurled hurtful words at me. Maybe he does believe the things that he said, maybe he said it to hurt me. I really don't care anymore. Yesterday, I cared. A lot.

This person told me that I was lacking as a mother. He said that I rely too much on the nanny to take care of my son and that I was not doing my duties to my son. He even compared me to our Mom. His exact words were "our mom never forgot her motherly responsibilities to us and so should you."

See, my Mom is a SAHM. She's a stay at home mom who is hands on in raising us. No, she did not bathe us or spoonfed us when we were grown children. We had nannies too. But she was a stay at home mom. She did her best to help with homework and the like. She checks on our grades and would sometimes cook us meal.

I love my Mom. I really do. I admire her for the things that she did for us. I do. But I am not her. I will never be her. I do not have her courage or braveness. And I know she did not have it either when she was my age. It was something she learned along the way which I hope to do as well.

We are different. We are two different people. Yes, she may be a better Mommy than I am but I am doing the best that I can. I listen to advise; only if given in the right manner. Telling me "start acting like a Mom" is not the way to go about it. Criticizing me is not the way to go about it especially if you're not even a parent yourself. What do you know about raising a child? The only persons who know this are people who have raised children on their own.

I do not know how to do child's play. I get bored when we have to build blocks for over an hour. I enjoy watching cartoons but I find that I enjoy teaching my child the ABC's and different things. Educational things. And so this is what I do when I play with B. We trace, we color, we spell, we sing.

They do not know this for I do not parade my quality time with my son. Quantity wise, it is lacking. I am a working Mom. I am a single Mom who does not get any financial support from the father of my child. Not a single dime. I am not a SAHM. I am a working Mom and my travel time in a day is 3-4 hours going to work and back home. I am human. I get tired. I work the night shift. That is even more tiring.

I am not making excuses for myself. I am merely stating facts in my life. I think, even for a little, I deserve some credit because I have been able to provide for my son's needs. I think, even a little, I deserve some credit because my son still looks forward to seeing me and spending time with me. If I was such a lousy mother, if I was just relying on the nanny 100% of the time, B would be calling the nanny Mommy and I'd be just a display to him.

I am not perfect. I am not even a great mother. I do however try to be the Mom that B needs. I have a lot of improvement to do but I am doing it one at a time. If that makes me a bad mom in your eyes, then that's your opinion. Keep it to yourself. I don't need more bad vibes in my life.

What I need is people who will support me and cheer me on to becoming the best Mom that I can be for my son; people who will give me advise and not critique me; people who will help me be the best Mom for B.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

organized chaos

this morning, this is what I was doing
end result for my books

and for 1/8 of my magnets

dinner at don hen

with a new friend
with an old one
Thanks Che! I had so much fun chatting and learning stuff. Teehee. Till next ...

Saturday, September 19, 2009

ice cream, green slippers, and finished gelatin

got this just because
and finished this too just because
loving my new slippers at work ...
and remember the gelatin I had the other day? now you see it ....
now you don't! LOL!

Friday, September 18, 2009

finally! headers for my blog

I started with the 1st picture as my "personalized" header for my blog. The 2nd one was made just this week to tweak the 2nd one but I still wasn't happy with it. I wanted something more smooth, more fine. A friend of mine asked for my pictures with B and said he will do something about it. A few days later, he sent me pictures 3 and 4 below.

I LOVE IT!!!!!!!! Aylabit!

It's exactly what I've wanted since I started blogging almost 4 years ago. Thanks Ron! This is one of the best gifts ever.

The 3rd picture will be going to my scrapbook and the 4th, its now the official header. =)

Thursday, September 17, 2009

happiness is a piece of gelatin ... MASSIVE piece

I got this from someone today. I mentioned that I've been craving this manila cathedral gelatin thingie about 2 weeks ago. I didn't know Arny was keeping track of it. Today, he brought me this. HAPPINESS! =)

I plan to finish the entire thing by myself. LOL!

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

buddypoke business cards

I made some today and I am loving it! Hehe ... so cute! It's an application on FACEBOOK called Buddypoke ... I love it! Lol!

Isn't it the cutest thing? Awww ....

rewards and recognitions

I rewarded myself today with this. It's the Twilight Journal set and I am so loving it! Hardbound journals and crisp white pages. I can't wait to write on it.

The picture below shows the goodie package I got from a coworker in the US whom I have never met ... he sent it through one of our bosses because he thought I really did a great job in helping him with something. I am so feeling the love! Thanks Ray! =)

I feel good today.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

B got banged on the cheek

B got pretty banged on the cheek earlier. He was playing with this other kid when things happened and the other kids forehead banged his cheekbones. Poor B cried so much. Here he is with an icepack to his cheeks. Notice that he did not smile at all in this picture and it was actually half an hour later before he was okay. I felt like crying seeing him like this but I had to remember its child's play and I cannot show him that I felt bad for him so I told him I'd take a picture so we can just laugh about it. Deep inside though I was hurting for my B.

poor B
the culprit

Monday, September 14, 2009

sibling date

We were supposed to go out as a family to celebrate K's award but my Mom was not in the mood to go out and B was still sleeping when we decided to leave. It was a good thing he didn't start crying when he woke up from his afternoon nap and I was not in the house.

It was just my siblings and I who headed to SM and did some little shopping. We got a dress for my Mom to wear to the Chef's awarding when he graduates. I got some sandals and the Chef and Techie got some clothes as well. K did not get anything because she left the money I gave her at home. Lol.

Afterwards we ate at Kenny Rogers and the ribs were so soft and chewy. YUMMY!

Saturday, September 12, 2009

smart runs in the family

3rd honor for the 1st Quarter
before going up on stage
She liked thiss pizza!
the required group shot
the sundae shot
the cutie sundae shot
chick and chips - LOVE IT!
the yummy french toast
the monster spaghetti meatball platter
We had a nice family lunch ... it was my sister's awarding again because she got to the top 3. It makes me feel good coz I part time tutor her and she studies by herself when I can't. I love that smart runs in the family. I hope my B got it too. I think he did. I know he did. =)

Friday, September 11, 2009

rainy days and hot chocolate

Everytime it rains, I feel the need to get myself a cup of hot chocolate and sit on our couch to contemplate on life. I don't know ... is it a movie influence ... something I read in a book and made my own ... or its just really the weather that makes it conducive?
Whatever it may be ...why don't you go grab a cup of hot chocolate and sit on the couch with me? What stories do you have to share? I'm listening.

Mafia Wars: MOSCOW

Yey! For those playing Mafia Wars, you can relate to this post. I am already a level 304 Mafia Don and about to finish NY and Cuba. Whee!