Hey lil brother ...
You and I, we grew up not always seeing eye to eye on things. I was quite flaky and made a lot of wrong decisions that ended up hurting me and because you love me, you get hurt that I hurt. You don't know how to show it to me so you end up getting mad at me because you don't want me to hurt and yet, I willingly allow others to hurt me.
I appreciate that. I understand that underneath your tough veneer lies a little brother who wants what is best for his older sister.
Now, the tables have turned.
You are hurting. I know that. We know that. You are hurting and because I am your older sister and I love you very much, I am hurting as well. I am hurting more than I will ever show you because I should not show you.
I need to be strong for you. We all do. We need to because right now, you are suffering. You are in pain because of someone who who hurt you immensely. I know that you don't want me to hate that person but I am your sister.
I will despise anyone who can hurt you this much. In my eyes, though you are not perfect and have faults of your own, no one has the right to hurt you the way you are hurting. No one.
I would like to tell you that it will be okay but for now, it won't be. It will hurt. It will hurt immenself ... badly ... deeply ... and it will hurt for a long time. You loved. Of course it will hurt now that the love you've had for quite some time is now gone.
But also know this ... though it will continue to hurt for a long time ... it won't go on forever. One day ... it may be next week, next month, or it could be next year but one day, you will wake up and you will realize it hurts a bit less. You will realize you can smile even half a smile. A real smile.
Things happen for a reason. It's a cliche but that's what cliche's are for. This happened to you and instead of just asking why ... learn the reason why and learn from it so that in the future, you can avoid it.
Most importantly, know that WE are here. We will always be here no matter what. Mom will always be there for you ... your twin will always be there for you and I, I will always always be there for you.
You are my little brother. You may look macho and strong but you will always be my little brother. I will always be ready to defend you and help you. For now, cry it out, be miserable, and cry a bit more. It's okay. You need to do that.
However, after a time, stop. You need to. You need to stop and move on ... not for us ... not for me ... not for anyone else but simply for you. You need to because you are worth it. You are worth loving and you deserve to be happy.
You told me before that my happiness shouldn't lie with a guy ... I tell you now, your happiness should not lie with a girl. Be happy simply because you choose to be happy ... be happy because you deserve to be happy. Be happy because eventhough you have flaws ... you also have a lot of good in you.
Be happy and move on when time is right because that is what you deserve. Until then, we'll just alternate between cheering you on and cracking a whip to get you back on track.
I love you little brother. I will always love you.
You're brother will be able to get back on his, I'm sure of that!
This is so amazing. A heartwarming letter to a brother re-assuring him that you all are behind his back. It's a relief for him if he reads this one. Nice one Kay. It's emotional but it's so nice to read. Very moving. :)ReplyDelete