it will happen ...

I spoke to you again; after almost a month of not talking to you, GLEE made a way for me to contact you. The moment you said "hey" in that special way of yours, I was hooked. Then again, I was never unhooked to begin with.

You sounded happy ... I hope it was because I called. I wanted to talk more but I needed to stop ... you were reeling me in again in your world of music and laughter ... yes, laughter. When we talk, I laugh a lot. When we talk, I'm happy. I'm just really happy.

When you sing, I listen. I write down the songs and I know that later on, I'll search for it and put it on your playlist. Yes, you have a playlist on my iPOD. Crazy no? Good thing you no longer read this. In some ways, I can express myself again and not be worried that you'd know how much I really feel for you.

I still feel for you, a lot. Remember, you were just boxed but it doesn't mean that I don't have feelings for you anymore. I wonder if you still have feelings for me too. I think you do. I hope you do. I really do.

My Mom asked me the other day if you were a toy or my boyfriend. I laughed and said neither. What I didn't say was that I could  never play you coz I wanted you to be my boyfriend. In time ... I hope you will be. I really do.

The surge of emotions and pain, happiness and sorrow ... all too familiar and yet, so raw ... only you can affect me this way. Only you.

So ... if we're meant to happen, we will. It will. Till then, lets go back to our own little boxes. It was nice hearing that "hey ..." though. It really was. I still have a smile on my face. I hope you do too.

Nang mawala ka sa akin, ikaw at ako'y nawalan:
ako dahil ikaw ang minahal ko nang lubusan
at ikaw dahil ako ang sa iyo'y lubusang nagmahal.
Ngunit sa dalawa ay ikaw ang higit na nawalan:
Dahil pwede kong mahalin ang iba tulad nang pagmamahal ko sa iyo
...ngunit ika'y di mamahalin tulad nang kung paano kita minahal.
-Ernesto Cardenal (Granada, Nicaragua, 1925 - )