Recap of February 2020

Yes, I am so ready for February 2020 to be over. January 2020 was a breeze compared to how this month has been. I even wrote about it on Day 6.


Don't get me wrong. February was great for the simple reason that Khali was born albeit via C-section. The night before was pretty tumultuous but thankfully, we survived. The next few days also taught us a lot of lessons about newborns.


February has been about change. So many changes. So many heartaches, heartbreaks, endings, and new beginnings.


Lola joined her creator 26th of February. I knew it was coming and even said goodbye to her. I thanked her for everything and told her to rest coz she was starting to be in pain. I thought I was prepared. Apparently, nothing really prepares you for the passing of someone you love.

It hit me hard. I cried. I wanted to weep but couldn't because I just had a C-section and it would be bad for my stitches. Losing her felt like a chapter in our life is closing.

She's been there since I was a kid and now, she's no longer there. She's just gone. I won't see her laugh, that twinkle in her eyes ever-present and the cats will no longer have her to cuddle with.

It hurts. It just really hurts.


My older sister has moved to Cebu with her family. The twins are both back in Singapore. Soon, M and I will have our own place with our kids.

Times are changing. Stories ending and new beginnings ... it's a little scary.


I've been able to write daily and keep a journal. It has helped me express myself on things that I am not able to share online because some details are too private.

Sometimes though, you just can't find the words and all you have is this empty space which sums up how you feel inside.

February was all about highs and lows. Hopefully, the next few months till the rest of the year will be more about highs and middle ground. 

Comments

  1. So sorry to hear of your loss - writing about the high and the lows certainly reminds us to live in the moment and embrace life in its purest form.

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  2. CONGRATS on your new little baby!!!!

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  3. omg I don't know what to say!!! Your Feb is great but also sad...Cheers to a wonderful March.

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  4. Life has many good things to enlighten our life and then takes away some of them too. I can relate your life with me. Faced many ups and downs but yes sharing through blogs helps to be strong and engaged. Nicely written and all best wishes for you

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  5. What a stressful month. The joys and pains of the circle of life have visited you and it sounds like you are stronger from it.

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Hi! Let's all try to add more positivity in this world and adhere to the saying, "if you don't have anything nice to say, keep silent."

Showering you with unicorn poop so you'd always stay magical! Heart heart!