single Mom's unite!

I met up with a fellow SB Collector today who also happened to be a single mom. She's a bit younger than I am but her kid is older. One thing about her stood out for me. It seems that she has not yet fully grasped the concept that she is already a Mom and this intrigued me.

Today, I had the chance to talk to her one on one and I learned a few things about her. So far, from what I have seen and observed, she needs a bit of guidance. To my surprise, she has seeked some of it from me.

Yep, seems I will be a mentor friend of some sort for her and for that I am deeply flattered. At the same time, I know that I will learn a lot from these because it will serve as a constant reminder to myself of the things that I need to focus on. When I remind her of these things, I am also reminding myself of it.

So thank you Kate ... for believing that I could possibly be a good influence in your life. I won't fail you.

To more lessons learned ... to failing because we tried and to winning because we tried.

and he kept me company ...

I spent  today in front of the computer, working on a part time job that earned me a bit of money which I badly needed. Throughout the day, I'd cuss and stretch cause my muscles were getting sore from sitting too much and my eyes tired from looking at the PC for so long.

All these time ... B kept me company. I was multi tasking and teaching him how to spell and learn math as well.

Defining moment: He has mastered 48 words and spelled them perfectly. I then asked him to write down his COMPLETE name. EPIC FAIL. He couldn't spell his Dad's last name. LOL.

friday night with another goddess ...

I met up with a friend of mine, L and hanged out with him on a Friday night. I felt like celebrating a little bit because of the many good news that have come my way after my crying session the other night.

Last night, I went out and met with a friend. Hence, the post about the bookworm and my longing for books. We had dinner at Bon Chon and I was super excited because he's never tried Bon Chon and my track record for Bon Chon recommendations have been pretty spotless.

capped the night at Starbucks in GB1

It was a pretty fun night! We talked, bonded, chatted, and picked on the people around us. Hahaha! Better to be the one doing the picking than be picked on I say.

the bookworm in me ...

So I was at Powerbooks yesterday and lo and behold, there are 3 new books by my favorite author.

James Patterson decides to mock me by releasing the following at a time that I am not able to buy anything because I need to prioritize other things.

• Toys
• Tick Tock 
• 10th Anniversarry 

And I also saw this trilogy of books that I have been eyeing.

• City of Glass
• City of Bones
• City of Ashes 

The best part is. someone is wanting to get me the following books. Eeekkk! Hahahaha ... tis making me super happy. It's been one great news after another. I deserve it. After all the tears I have shed, I deserve this. 

I'm also looking forward to reading The Hunger Games. I have read Book 1 and I already borrowed Book 2 and 3. Tomorrow, I am sure I will have time to read it at work since its a Sunday. :)

The bookworm in me is wriggling with happiness.

Momo Cafe, I heart your omelette...

I had breakfast today at Momo Cafe with a friend and I decided to try their spinach and crab omelette. I'm a fan of this  dish and I have been looking for the perfect one. Today, I seem to have met THE omelette. Yey!

spinach and crab omelette

the strawberry frozen tea

and this is what my date had ...

I am definitely coming back to Momo to have their omelette again.

it comes in 3's

Last night, I cried myself to sleep. I cried for 3 hours and ended up falling asleep. March was not so kind to me. I received bad news, one after the other. I received low blows from some people who were supposed to be on my side but apparently thinks so little of me and have no disregard for what I feel.

And so last night, I finally cried. I cried for myself mostly. I cried because I have been working so hard to get better. I know I'm not the best Mom to my son nor am I the best version of myself but I have been trying. I know that financially, I am still in deep shit but I am finding ways and means to get to where I need to be without asking Mommy and Daddy for money. I have failed but I am overcoming it on my own.

I cried for myself and my heart. I cried because a lot of guys want me, they do and they are a lot but they only want a part of me. They want my body for sex, they want to show me off coz I'm pretty, and they love my company coz I'm smart, funny, and what not. They want me for how I make them feel ... how I make them laugh ... how I'm the life of the party. They want me cause I fill a need in them; but they do not want ME.

I cried for myself and my son. I am scared ... scared that I will never be enough for him, that I won't be able to raise him well, and that I will just suck at this whole Mom thing. I cried because I wanted to give my son everything he deserves but I can't even give him a father. It's just me, myself, and I.

And so I cried ... but today, I woke up and I am done crying. Today, I put on a smile and went my way. Today, I once again am the strong Kay that I have to be.

Today, I received some good news, great message, and wonderful surprise.

It all does come in 3's.

early this morning ... mr caller, this shot is for you.

the flowers I got from a DJ

So there. Everything comes in 3's.

walls ...

Sometimes you put up walls
not just to protect yourself 
but to also see
who cares enough to tear it down. 

Today, two people told me that I always have my defenses up. One told me that I need to learn to trust and just let things flow. The other, after telling me he reads my blog because he's that interested (and me keeping quiet) told me that I have my walls up again. I said it wasn't true but I realized after I put the phone down that he was right. I do have it up.

I don't know. Somewhere between March and now, whenever I hear something nice from a guy, whenever I feel a semblance of sweetness in a guy (and I think he may be serious), it just goes up. I can't help it. It's become a habit. One I am planning on keeping.

I need to. I will never let anyone get close. I can't  afford it. I can't afford to hurt again and again and again. Even just a possibility, I will quelch. I just can't do it anymore.

So yes JD, that guy who plans to get close will have to tear down these walls. Unfortunately for whoever it is, these walls are made of titanium. It can't be crushed nor tore down.

old couples

time fades
time runs swiftly
you held my hand in yours
withered, wrinkled, old

you smile at me
I have seen that smile for a lifetime
I wake up to it in the morning
I sleep to it at night

you whisper in my ear
the same voice I hear
raging at me in a fight
caressing me when I'm sad
always telling me "I love you."

you held me in your arms
when I was getting chills from the fever
when I was  sad because someone left
when I was angry and hurting
until nothing matters anymore
but you holding me in your arms.

a lifetime
a season
a love that lasts
this is what we have
this is all that we have
this is all that I have.

Fridays on a Tuesday

It's been exactly a month since the last time we saw each other and we made time to see each other today. I had to battle 3 hours of traffic but it was worth it since I was able to spend time a good friend today. She's one of those rare gems that you find on a sidewalk. I'm glad to have met her.

fried mac and cheese

seafood and herb pasta

Good food. Full tummy. Great company. TGIF, you never fail!

SB collectors mini meet up at the South

This afternoon, I had an impromptu meet up with 2 SB collectors who both live in the South. It was fun and though it was quick, I hope the meet up leads to a lifetime of TRUE friendship. We stayed at Red Ribbon and Kate treated L and I. Whee! FREE FOOD! Hahahahaha!

friendship mug (I had a spare.)

my coffee crunch = 2 hours jogging tomorrow

fried chicken rice

Great way to cap the weekend!

are we ready?

So I googled some stuff that a 5 year old should know already and I am a wee bit panicky. Here they are. The ones in read are the ones that I still need to make sure my son has learned.

• Recite full name, address and age
• Follow simple directions
• Name basic colors
• Use five- to eight-word sentences
• Recite several nursery rhymes
• Draw a stick person with head, body, arms and legs
• Cut with scissors
• Listen to a story or book
• Draw with crayon or marker
• Know ABCs
• Count to 10
• Sort similar objects by size, shape or color
• Know basic body parts
• Understand opposites like in/out, up/down
• Know basic shapes
• Can put together a simple puzzle

Eeekkk.

I can do this. We can do this. We need to do this. God have mercy on us.

love the way you lie

I am wonderful
Everyone loves me
Everyone wants to be me

I am secure
I do not have moments of doubt
I always know what I want

I am sexy
When I wear a dress it looks good on me
I stand out in a crowd even in tees and jeans

I am successful
Money is not an issue for me
Things just fall into place for me

I am unstoppable
Problems do not faze me
Nothing ever rattles me

I am all these and more
I am what I want to be
I  believe all these,
in my fantasy world.

* this is a poem created for a challenge called "lie to me"  where we were tasked to create a poem full of lies about ourself. 

RIO happy meal toys ...

Today, I finally completed the RIO happy meal toys. This is of course with the help of friends. Teehee!

I got 5 toys yesterday and today, I took out B to go to McDo and get the other 3. Here are photos of my son putting on his socks and shoes all by himself. 

And here he is, with his new toys ...

He was happy. I'm happy.

goal: get this back!

I plan to get this back and hence, the reason why I have not eaten the bar of chocolate my Dad gave me. LOL. Temptations abound. Must resist.

Happy Saturday! I've lost inches and pounds. Boo yeah!

Fely J's ...

It wasn't meant to happen. I was supposed to go jogging tonight and to feel the wind on my face and dance the night away at Ayala Triangle. This is what I had in mind and it did not happen.

I am glad that my plans for the night was altered by fate. I say fate because I just got a text from someone and apparently, he was working in the same area that I was and we ended up having lunch and then ended up having dinner as well.

I had fun. We talked about past loves and heartaches and cheesy lines. It was a good night. It was relaxing and it was what I needed. Thank you.

Lolo Ising's Adobo

broccoli and chicken mushroom

my friend, Steven and I

As for the place where we ate, the adobo was quite good but if that was their best seller, I don't really get the fuss about the place. Maybe I should go back and try the other things on the menu for now, I am holding some reservation about recommending the place.