First of all, I have been poor. I don't mean squatter poor or Payatas poor but I have gone through a phase or months in my life where I wondered where I would get the money for the next meal. I have gone through a day with only pansit canton to tide me over the whole day and I was 7 months pregnant. Obviously, it wasn't enough nutrition but it was the only thing that I could afford that time.
I started with that to set the premise that I have been at that point where I had no money so I know how it feels to have money. I have also been to that point where I can buy a few luxuries here and there. I have an idea of what the two sides of the story are.
Still, I say, and I mean this with all my heart, money isn't everything. You can have all the money in the world and still be miserable and lonely. You can have just the right amount that you need to be comfortable and be truly happy.
I am aiming for the latter.
I do not need a lot of money. I have never wanted a lot of money. I just want to have a bit more than enough to have a comfortable life for B and I. My dream house is one of those two storey 2 bedroom lots in Camella.
Yes, my dream is that simple compared to those who want a house that has 5 bedrooms, a garden, garage, swimming pool, lanai and the like. I just want that simple house.
Earlier I was talking to someone and I told this person someone offered to buy me a DSLR in New York and that person will ship it here. She told me that she'd smack me if I decline. I said I did already. She told me that I have been like this ever since and nothing has come out of my life. She said that in this life, money ranks really high and that to have a lot of it is good.
I replied that I can make my own money and so I don't need someone else to buy me the camera. I can save for it and then buy it. I said that I earn my own money. She said, "really? And look at you."
I was hurt. I was really hurt. Granted that I am nowhere being rich but I make do. I am still able to give a few luxuries to my son and take him out from time to time. I am able to send him to a private school. I am able to support his immediate needs.
I do all this with money that I make and work hard for. I wade through floods, sit for 3 hours on a bus ride just to get to work.
I work hard and I earn MY OWN MONEY. I EARN IT.
I was so hurt that she just belittled it. I was also disappointed that she now thinks that way. Part of me understands why she's become so focused with money but a part of me longs for that person she used to be; the one who would work hard to make her own money.
I hope that I never lose my desire to earn my own money and buy things for myself. Yes, it feels good to receive lavish gifts but it also feels damn good when you buy something for yourself.
I would know. Everytime I look at my iPOD, my camera, my headphones, and my new bag, I feel damn good. They may be pricey but I worked my ass off to buy them.
I will always choose to make my own money than have it simply handed to me. It's the best way to ensure you will always be grateful for things around you.