Sunday, June 9, 2013
munimuni # 82
Tomorrow, I am going to start work in what seems to be a great company. I've heard really good stuff about them and the account that I would be in so I'm pretty stoked. I hope that everything I've heard is true.
I'm nervous. I'm really nervous. I feel like I'm starting all over again. I feel like I'm this new graduate that just entered into the corporate world. I'm nervous about the new place, new environment, new culture, and new people. It's scary. I feel like I'm also going to university for the first time.
Its scary because people judge you upon sight. Its scary because people, especially women in general, simply hate me upon sight. I've always struggled between being aloof to appear like I don't care even when I really do and being friendly to try and fit in but most likely failing to do so.
Some people think that a pretty face is a blessing. Sometimes I think its a curse cause some people hate me for it and most guys just wanna do not so nice stuff with me because of it. Sometimes, I wish that people wouldn't notice me so much when I walk into a room or enter a new company. Unfortunately, it rarely happens that way.
So hopefully, tomorrow, I get to start over and I make friends. I'm not aiming for Miss Friendship but I am hoping that I wouldn't make so many enemies. I just want a quiet life.
No new updates on FM save for he asked me to see me last week and I think its partially because he misses me. I think. Well, I hope.
B's gonna be in 2nd grade and he is growing up so fast. My little boy isn't so little anymore but I have to accept that. I just wish I could shield him from all the pain he will encounter but I know I can't. I just have to be there for him.
Wish me luck for the coming few days of my life ... or weeks ... or months ... or years.