Thursday, March 11, 2010

a grown up

Last night, some people and I were playing Query and the question I got was "When did you realize you have become a grown up?"

I felt teary eyed. I actually wanted to cry. This question hit me hard because it took such a long time for me to grow up. I'm 29 now but it was only recently that I really grew up.

I realized I was a grown up when I could no longer depend on my Mom to make a decision for me or my friends. I normally would ask friends to tell me which is the best course to go to. Now, I know that at the end of the day, I need to make a decision on my own, stand by it, and face the consequences of my actions. I can't run to Mommy anymore and cry in her arms and be told that things will be okay. I need to learn to hide my tears and plaster a smile on my face and say that I'm okay even when I'm not okay.

I need to face the consequences of my actions no matter how painful it is. I need to learn and to move on even when I want to stay. I need to be a grown up.

And so finally, I grew up.

It's a very painful process. I'ts very painful. But I have, and no matter how much I want to go back to that sniveling, whiny creature that I was and run to Mommy and let her hug me and tell me that I will be okay, that my heart will mend, that the tears will stop, I won't. I need to face the consequences of my actions, suffer, cry, learn, be strong, and move on.

This is me being a grown up. This is me still growing up.

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Hi! Let's all try to add more positivity in this world and adhere to the saying, "if you don't have anything nice to say, keep silent."

Showering you with unicorn poop so you'd always stay magical! Heart heart!