Friday, July 16, 2010

dear B

You are now 5 years old ... you are cultivating your own personality and sometimes, I feel so lost. I don't know how to handle you. You have become so hard headed that I feel like I am a failure as a Mom. I do want to be there for you all the time B but I also need to work and I also need some me time to survive.

They say you are better behaved when I am not around but lately, you seem to be testing the waters so much. You are stretching the limits of the people around that I worry how we will be when its just us in a house.

I hope that this is just a phase. Am I lacking in showing you that I love you? Do I lack quality time with you? What am I doing wrong B? I hope you can tell me what exactly you need from me. I so want to be the Mom that you need me to be.

I want you to grow up with respect for others and love for yourself. I want you to be a good, brave boy. I want so much for you B; all good things. I hope I am able to give it to you. I hope that no matter how many mistakes I may be committing now, I am still able to teach you what you need to learn.

I love you B. So much ... Happy 5th birthday my son ...

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Hi! Let's all try to add more positivity in this world and adhere to the saying, "if you don't have anything nice to say, keep silent."

Showering you with unicorn poop so you'd always stay magical! Heart heart!