You and I have always been honest with each other. We promised to not
give one another false hopes and so far, we have made good with this
promise.
Sometimes though, when you remind me of it, it
hurts. I guess there's a difference between knowing that whatever we
have may not be forever and then having you remind me that there is no
forever. Its just so in your face.
It makes it all the
more real .... like we've set us up already to fail and that though the
end is not something that is tangible, we're already saying that
definitely, this will not be something that will last.
It hurts. Its the reality and it hurts.
Monday, July 13, 2015
Yawyan Alasan at work ...
I have been with the Yawyan Alasan program for roughly 4 months though if I were to be honest, its only 3 months since I missed out on 2 weeks in June and 2 weeks in July. Yikes. Well, pains of being a single Mom financially raising a 10 year old son all on my own.
Anyway, I'm just really glad that I stuck it out with this program and that the coaches are so darn patient with me and my bluster. You see, I have severe separation anxiety from my fats whom I have had for the last 11 years. It's the longest relationship I have ever had in my life after all. Haha.
On a serious note, Yaywan Alasan has really helped me be more active and it has helped me in cutting down a few inches off of my fats. After all, the program is not for the weak of heart. Yawyan requires dedication and the will to pursue even when every muscle in your body is telling you to stop the madness.
I would know. There were days I couldn't walk up or down the stairs without saying "ouchie!" over and over again. However, feeling the fats turn to muscles, feeling your pants loosen a little, and finding yourself not huffing and puffing so much like you used to before is such an achievement that you will find yourself going back for more.
As you can see, this is not your typical gym nor is it your usual circuit training. Here, we combine things and make sure that we make getting fit, fun. We also have our coaches constantly monitoring everything that we do so that no one will get injured.
This is one of the things that I really like about Yawyan. Here, you are not just another member but a part of the family. The girls are all nice and supportive of each other. When you work out here, you feel a little better knowing that the person next to you is just in as much pain as you are. Haha.
For those interested, please visit the official facebook page for more details. As for the ladies, as you can see, there are a lot of us so please do join us and work with us in getting you the body you yearn for while learning self defense.
Anyway, I'm just really glad that I stuck it out with this program and that the coaches are so darn patient with me and my bluster. You see, I have severe separation anxiety from my fats whom I have had for the last 11 years. It's the longest relationship I have ever had in my life after all. Haha.
On a serious note, Yaywan Alasan has really helped me be more active and it has helped me in cutting down a few inches off of my fats. After all, the program is not for the weak of heart. Yawyan requires dedication and the will to pursue even when every muscle in your body is telling you to stop the madness.
I would know. There were days I couldn't walk up or down the stairs without saying "ouchie!" over and over again. However, feeling the fats turn to muscles, feeling your pants loosen a little, and finding yourself not huffing and puffing so much like you used to before is such an achievement that you will find yourself going back for more.
As you can see, this is not your typical gym nor is it your usual circuit training. Here, we combine things and make sure that we make getting fit, fun. We also have our coaches constantly monitoring everything that we do so that no one will get injured.
This is one of the things that I really like about Yawyan. Here, you are not just another member but a part of the family. The girls are all nice and supportive of each other. When you work out here, you feel a little better knowing that the person next to you is just in as much pain as you are. Haha.
For those interested, please visit the official facebook page for more details. As for the ladies, as you can see, there are a lot of us so please do join us and work with us in getting you the body you yearn for while learning self defense.
when sadness trumps happiness
Sometimes, people just fall apart for no reason. Sometimes, its the biggest fiasco in the world that leads to the destruction of what once was the most beautiful thing on Earth. Oftentimes though, people are not able to really pinpoint why they drifted away, fell out of love, or just took different paths from each other ... from someone the they vowed to love for the rest of their life or till the day they die.
I think its because where before happiness trumped any sadness or pain that someone brings in your life, now its the complete opposite. I believe that we drift away when we no longer feel as happy as we used to, when the sadness overtakes us, and the pain becomes too much to bear.
When this happens ... sometimes, even when we don't want to, it's time to say goodbye.
I think its because where before happiness trumped any sadness or pain that someone brings in your life, now its the complete opposite. I believe that we drift away when we no longer feel as happy as we used to, when the sadness overtakes us, and the pain becomes too much to bear.
When this happens ... sometimes, even when we don't want to, it's time to say goodbye.
Saturday, July 11, 2015
love, support, and acceptance
I have been in relationships where I gave my all out support and received nothing in return. I have also been in relationships where the guy gave it his all and I, not so much. Now, I am in a relationship where there is mutual support and it is the most exhilarating feeling in the world.
Even when we were dating, Bear has always been very supportive of everything that I do. He would constantly push me to be better in everything, be it my job, working out, or just plain writing. He says that he loves reading the things that I have written and he always compliments me on it.
Whenever I accomplish something and he learns of it, he is always excited and happy for me. I can feel that he really is proud of what I do for a living, my achievements, and the talents that I have. When I sing, he listens. When I tell stories, he remembers them. When I show him a new article, he reads it immediately. When I close a new client, he cheers me on.
All of these matters to me and I am grateful for it.
When I am not in the best mood, he pisses me off even more and when I get mad, he kisses my bad mood away and gives me a tight hug. He's crazy that way. When I am sad, he makes time to talk to me and ease me out of it. When I have fears, he reminds me of how far I have gone and when insecurities overtake me, he makes me feel like the most beautiful woman on Earth.
Now mind you, he's not perfect.
He is very private. He doesn't let people in easily and though I have been seeing him for quite some time now, he still has many walls up. He doesn't trust easily because he has been betrayed many times in the past by the people he should have been able to trust. Yet, he lets me in on his world little by little, allowing me a peek here and there. I do not try to pry, I just leave him be, hoping that perhaps one day he feels that he can trust me. See, I believe that trust needs to be earned and I am willing to earn it from him.
His first love also happens to be basketball and when it comes to basketball, no girl will ever get in the way. This is how I knew he loved me. He actually moved a game so that he and I could talk when I demanded that we needed to talk. This may sound trivial to some but trust me when I say that when a guy is deeply into something, you gotta be pretty special for them to willingly forsake their passion. Keyword: willingly.
He also sees himself doing better in Australia and soon he will be leaving. As much as I long to have him near me, I know that this is something he really wants and so I need to support him on this. I want to support him on this. I am supporting him on this. If he needs to spread his wings to be able to fly as high as he can, then I will set him free and let him fly high up in the sky where he belongs. You see, to know him is to know that he is not meant to be with mortals. He is meant to fly high and make great things happen and I want that for him.
He and I, we accept each other in all our flaws and quirks. We support each others dreams and we love each other. I believe that this is the kind of love that we all need to have in our life. We may not know what the future holds for us but we have made this promise: we will make this love last as long as we possibly can and we will always have love and respect between us. I think that at the end of the day, this is all that matters.
Thursday, July 9, 2015
Isang Letra ni Juan Miguel Severo
"Hindi pa."
Nakakatawa ang dalawang salitang yon. "Hindi pa."
Parang ang gandang pakinggan sa umpisa.
Parang laging may paanyaya ng simula.
Kumain ka na ba? Hindi pa.
Napanood mo na ba itong pelikula? Hindi pa.
Natikman mo na ba 'to? Hindi pa.
Natikman mo na ba ako? Hindi pa.
Hindi pa. Parang laging may kasunod na "pero gusto ko sana".
Parang magsisimula ng maraming "oo."
Tama.
Magsisimula.
May pangako ng isang simula.
Kaya siguro magandang pakinggan sa una dahil sa pinapangakong simula pero
hindi pa. Sandali. Wag muna.
Mahal ko na ba? Hindi pa.
Sandali. Wag muna. Mahal ko na ba? Wag muna.
Tapos na ba? Hindi pa. Wag sana.
"Hindi pa."
Nagustuhan ko itong dalawang salita dahil, sa ibang pagkakataon,
para bang may pangako na balang araw magiging "hindi na".
Umaasa ka pa ba? Hindi na.
Naghihintay ka pa ba? Hindi na.
Masakit pa ba? Hindi na.
Mahal mo pa ba siya? Hindi na.
Tama.
Wakas.
Hudyat ng isang wakas.
Kaya siguro magandang pakinggan hanggang sa ngayon
dahil sa hinuhudyat nitong pagwawakas.
Hindi ba?
Umaasa ka pa ba? Hindi na.
Naghihintay ka pa ba? Hindi na.
Masakit pa ba? Hindi na.
Mahal mo pa ba siya? Hindi na.
Mahal mo pa ba siya? Hindi na.
Mahal mo pa ba siya? Hindi na.
Mahal ka pa ba niya? Hindi na.
Umaasa ka pa ba? Umaasa ka pa ba?
Nakalimutan mo na ba siya? Hindi na.
Hindi na?Nakalimutan mo na ba siya? Hindi pa.
Tangina. Nagsimula pero hindi tayo matapos-tapos sa hindi pa at hindi na.
Tangina. Isang letra lang ang pinagkaiba.
Wala pang isang segundo ang kailangan para isulat.
Isang pindot lang sa keyboard at tangina ang tagal na pero hanggang ngayon hindi pa.
Pag tinakpan mo nga ang ilalim ng letrang p, magmumukha na itong hindi na.
Pero hindi pa.
Kung anu-ano na ang pinangtakip ko pero ganon pa rin siya.
Kung anu-ano na ang pinambura ko pero hanggang ngayon nasa simula pa.
Kung sinu-sino na ang nilapitan ko pero nasa'yo pa rin ang mga paa ko.
Nasa'yo pa rin ako.
Sabihin mo nga:
Gaano karaming salita pa ang kailangan kong isulat para mapalitan ang isang letra?
Mga Basang Unan ni Juan Miguel Severo
Noong
iwan mo ako nang walang pasabi at pangako ng pagbabalik umiyak ako buong gabi.
Umiyak ako nang sobrang tindi, kinailangan kong ibilad sa araw ang unan ko
kinabukasan. Ang sarap pala sa pakiramdam ng patulugin ka ng sarili mong
pag-iyak. Naisip ko, hindi pinakuluang dahon ng bayabas o alak ang sagot sa
ganitong klaseng sakit. Luha ang pinaka-mabisang
panglanggas sa sugat ng puso.
Kaya
inaraw-araw ko ito. Sinisimulan at tinatapos ko ang mga araw na ginagamot ang
mga sugat na iniwan mo. Binabalikan ko lahat ng alaala at hinahanap kung saan
silang lahat bumaon sa puso ko. Nakakatawa. Akala ko noon, kung dumating man
ang panahon na 'to, puro alaala ng mga away at hindi natin pagkakasunduan ang
mga sugat na iintindihin ko. Na sila ang mahirap gamutin. Na sila ang, kahit
ilang balde na ng luha ang aking pigain mula sa mata ko, magdurugo pa rin.
Pero
mas nagdurugo ako para sa mga tawa mo. Mas nagdurugo ako sa mga patawa mo. Mas
nagdurugo ako sa mga yakap mo. Sa kung paanong ang balat ko ay parang nalalapnos
kapag dahan-dahan mo akong hinahaplos at kung paanong ang hininga ko ay
nahahapo at kinakapos kapag niyayapos kita. Nadurog ako noong gabing
umalis ka, pero mas nagdurugo ako sa unang gabi na pinili mong manatili.
Nadurog ako noong gabing sinabi mong ayaw mo na, pero mas nagdurugo ako sa
gabing tinanong mo ako kung puwede pa ba. Nadurog ako noong gabing tinalikuran
mo ako, pero mas nagdurugo ako na noong pagtalikod ko, nandoon ka pa. Nadurog
ako noong sinabi mong hindi mo na ako mahal, at nagdurugo ako, at nagdurugo
ako, at nadudurog at nadudurog at nagdurugo pa rin ako sa alaala na ikaw pa ang
mas naunang magsabi ng "Mahal kita."
Mahal.
Kita.
Kung
titignan ko nang maigi ang mga salitang isinulat ng lahat ng mga sugat na
naiwan mo, yang dalawang yan ang mababasa ko. Mahal. Kita. At sa inaraw-araw ng
pagbibilad-unan ko, nagmamahid na sila. Mahal. Kita. At sa dami ng luha na
pinanglanggas ko rito, naglalangib na sila. Mahal. Kita. At sa tagal nilang
kumikirot dito sa dibdib ko, medyo nakakasanay na. Mahal. Kita. At sa tagal ng
panahon na ginugol ko sa gamutan, sigurado magsasara na sila. Magsasara at
magiging pilat na paulit-ulit kong mababasa at ang parati lang sasabihin ay
"Mahal kita."
Mahal,
kung magkita tayong muli at tanungin mo ako uli kung puwede pa ba, ang
hihilingin ko lang sa'yo ay mga bagong unan. Dahil lahat ng akin ay 'kala mo
naulanan dahil lahat sila ay akin nang naiyakan ng mga kwento natin at nag-iwan
ng marka sa kanila at ayaw ko na. Ayaw ko nang matulog sa unang basa at malunod
sa pagtulog sa alaala na mahal kita. Mahal nga pala kita. Mahal pa rin pala
kita. At sa wakas, hindi na kasing sakit ng dati, pero mahal, masakit pa.
Ito na ang huling tula na isusulat ko para Sayo by Juan Miguel Severo
Ito na ang huling tula na isusulat ko para sayo.
Pangako yan at totoo.
Hindi ko alam kung magiging gaano kahaba o kung kasya ba sa isang piyesa,
ilang pahina, ilang minuto ang ihahaba, itatagal nito,
at posibleng hindi ko agad makabisado pero pangako yan,
ito na ang huling tula na isusulat ko para sayo.
Itaga mo to sa bato,
abutin man ako ng umaga dito hindi ko ipipikit ang mga matang ito..
uubusin ko ang lahat ng salita na posibleng tugma ng pangalan mo o anumang tawag ko sayo,
mahal, sinta, irog, pangga, babe, bbq, bae, beb, asawa ko, mhine, kulet, kapal, kupal, hayop, p**a, p***ng ina ka ano pa ba..
wala akong pakialam kung abutin man ako ng ilang talata dito,
pero hindi ko na pwedeng patirahin lang dito sa loob ko ang mga salitang ito kaya pangako,
ito na ang huling tula na isusulat ko para sayo.
Magsisimula ako sa umpisa,
sa kung paanong nginitian mo ako at tinanong kung san ako nakatira.
hindi mo nga pinansin ang mga agiw sa dingding,
hindi ka nga natinag sa ipis na biglang dumating sa iyong pagbisita..
pero hindi mo rin man lang din tinignan ang mga libro na nasa tabi ng kama kong natutulog din, at tangi ko noong kapiling.
Magsisimula ako sa umpisa,
sa kung paanong niyakap mo ako nung sabihin ko sayong "mahal kita..”
sa kung paanong hinalikan mo ako sa noo sabay sabi na “mahalaga ka..”
at ako naman tong si tanga, tuwang tuwa na hindi pa nalinaw nga na ayaw ko na maging mahalaga,
ayaw ko na maging mahalaga..
Hindi ako antigong salamin na matagal mo nang pag aari
na tinitignan mo lang para ipaalala sa sarili mo na maganda ka, ayaw ko na maging mahalaga..
hindi ako telepono mong dudukutin lang sa bulsa kapag kelangan mo ng solusyon sa kawalan mo ng koneksyon sa mundo mong masyado ng malawak para bigyang atensyon ka pa, ayaw ko na maging mahalaga..
hindi ako kuwintas na isusuot mo lang sa piling-piling mga okasyon
kapag meroong mga sitwasyon na pakiramdam mo ay kulang ka pa..
Hindi ako para ibalik sa loob ng isang kahon kapag matutulog ka na sa gabi sa takot na masakal ka sa yakap ko kapag mahimbing ka na,
o ibalik sa loob ng isang kahon at itabi sa sulok ng isang aparador
sa takot na manakaw ako ng iba, ayaw ko na maging mahalaga..
Ang gusto ko ay mahalin,
ang kelangan ko ay mahalin..
kelangan ko na mahalin mo ako gaya ng kape mo sa umaga
tanggap ang tamis at pait, kelangan para sa init pero hindi isinasantabi dahil lang nanlamig na..
kelangan ko na mahalin mo ako gaya ng sarili mong opisina,
kabisado kung para saan ang ano, kabisado kung saan nakatago ang alin,
kabisado ang mga tinatago kong patalim, silbi, dumi, lihim..
patalim, silbi, dumi lihim…
kelangan ko na mahalin mo ako gaya ng unan mo sa gabi, niyayakap sa ginaw,
sinasandalan kahit na mainit, binubulungan ng mga pinakatatago mong panaginip,
ayaw ko na maging mahalaga, ang gusto ko ay mahalin,
ang kelangan ko ay mahalin..
at nagsulat ako noon para lang mahalin mo ako,
kaya patawad pero magsusulat ako hanggang sa maubos ko ang lahat ng salita na posibleng tugma ng pangalan mo..
patawad pero magsusulat ako para patawarin mo ako..
dahil minsan, may nakapagsabi saken na ang taong hindi raw marunong magpatawad ay hindi makapagsusulat,
kaya mahal sa pagkakataong ito
sa huling pagkakataon na magsusulat ako ng tula para sayo
gumawa tayo ng kasunduan, patatawarin kita pero patatawarin mo rin ako…
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko pagtahan at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo pagluha
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko pananahimik at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo pagsasalita
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko pag alis at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo pananatili
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko sayo paglimot at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo saken pagpili mahal
gumawa tayo ng kasunduan patatawarin kita pero patatawarin mo rin ako.
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko pagbitiw at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo pagkapit
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko paglayo at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo paglapit
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko pagsuko at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo pagsugal
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko pagkamuhi sayo at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo saken pagmamahal, mahal
gumawa tayo ng kasunduan patatawarin kita pero patatawarin mo rin ako
para sa wakas ay matapos ko na itong tula na masyado ng matagal na nakatira dito,
at patawad kung magiging masyadong mahaba at marami masyadong bulanas pero pangako,
huli na to, huli na to, huli na to…
Magsisimula ako uli sa umpisa, sa kung paanong nginitian mo ako at tinanong kung san ako nakatira.
Magsisimula ako uli sa umpisa, sa kung paanong nginitian mo ako
Magsisimula ako uli sa umpisa,
Magsisimula ako uli…
Magsisimula ako….
Ito na ang huling tula na isusulat ko para sayo, mali…
Ito na ang huling tula na isinulat ko tungkol sayo
Iniibig kita, at ubos na ubos na ako…
Pangako yan at totoo.
Hindi ko alam kung magiging gaano kahaba o kung kasya ba sa isang piyesa,
ilang pahina, ilang minuto ang ihahaba, itatagal nito,
at posibleng hindi ko agad makabisado pero pangako yan,
ito na ang huling tula na isusulat ko para sayo.
Itaga mo to sa bato,
abutin man ako ng umaga dito hindi ko ipipikit ang mga matang ito..
uubusin ko ang lahat ng salita na posibleng tugma ng pangalan mo o anumang tawag ko sayo,
mahal, sinta, irog, pangga, babe, bbq, bae, beb, asawa ko, mhine, kulet, kapal, kupal, hayop, p**a, p***ng ina ka ano pa ba..
wala akong pakialam kung abutin man ako ng ilang talata dito,
pero hindi ko na pwedeng patirahin lang dito sa loob ko ang mga salitang ito kaya pangako,
ito na ang huling tula na isusulat ko para sayo.
Magsisimula ako sa umpisa,
sa kung paanong nginitian mo ako at tinanong kung san ako nakatira.
hindi mo nga pinansin ang mga agiw sa dingding,
hindi ka nga natinag sa ipis na biglang dumating sa iyong pagbisita..
pero hindi mo rin man lang din tinignan ang mga libro na nasa tabi ng kama kong natutulog din, at tangi ko noong kapiling.
Magsisimula ako sa umpisa,
sa kung paanong niyakap mo ako nung sabihin ko sayong "mahal kita..”
sa kung paanong hinalikan mo ako sa noo sabay sabi na “mahalaga ka..”
at ako naman tong si tanga, tuwang tuwa na hindi pa nalinaw nga na ayaw ko na maging mahalaga,
ayaw ko na maging mahalaga..
Hindi ako antigong salamin na matagal mo nang pag aari
na tinitignan mo lang para ipaalala sa sarili mo na maganda ka, ayaw ko na maging mahalaga..
hindi ako telepono mong dudukutin lang sa bulsa kapag kelangan mo ng solusyon sa kawalan mo ng koneksyon sa mundo mong masyado ng malawak para bigyang atensyon ka pa, ayaw ko na maging mahalaga..
hindi ako kuwintas na isusuot mo lang sa piling-piling mga okasyon
kapag meroong mga sitwasyon na pakiramdam mo ay kulang ka pa..
Hindi ako para ibalik sa loob ng isang kahon kapag matutulog ka na sa gabi sa takot na masakal ka sa yakap ko kapag mahimbing ka na,
o ibalik sa loob ng isang kahon at itabi sa sulok ng isang aparador
sa takot na manakaw ako ng iba, ayaw ko na maging mahalaga..
Ang gusto ko ay mahalin,
ang kelangan ko ay mahalin..
kelangan ko na mahalin mo ako gaya ng kape mo sa umaga
tanggap ang tamis at pait, kelangan para sa init pero hindi isinasantabi dahil lang nanlamig na..
kelangan ko na mahalin mo ako gaya ng sarili mong opisina,
kabisado kung para saan ang ano, kabisado kung saan nakatago ang alin,
kabisado ang mga tinatago kong patalim, silbi, dumi, lihim..
patalim, silbi, dumi lihim…
kelangan ko na mahalin mo ako gaya ng unan mo sa gabi, niyayakap sa ginaw,
sinasandalan kahit na mainit, binubulungan ng mga pinakatatago mong panaginip,
ayaw ko na maging mahalaga, ang gusto ko ay mahalin,
ang kelangan ko ay mahalin..
at nagsulat ako noon para lang mahalin mo ako,
kaya patawad pero magsusulat ako hanggang sa maubos ko ang lahat ng salita na posibleng tugma ng pangalan mo..
patawad pero magsusulat ako para patawarin mo ako..
dahil minsan, may nakapagsabi saken na ang taong hindi raw marunong magpatawad ay hindi makapagsusulat,
kaya mahal sa pagkakataong ito
sa huling pagkakataon na magsusulat ako ng tula para sayo
gumawa tayo ng kasunduan, patatawarin kita pero patatawarin mo rin ako…
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko pagtahan at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo pagluha
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko pananahimik at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo pagsasalita
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko pag alis at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo pananatili
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko sayo paglimot at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo saken pagpili mahal
gumawa tayo ng kasunduan patatawarin kita pero patatawarin mo rin ako.
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko pagbitiw at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo pagkapit
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko paglayo at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo paglapit
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko pagsuko at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo pagsugal
Patawarin mo ako sa hindi ko pagkamuhi sayo at patatawarin kita sa hindi mo saken pagmamahal, mahal
gumawa tayo ng kasunduan patatawarin kita pero patatawarin mo rin ako
para sa wakas ay matapos ko na itong tula na masyado ng matagal na nakatira dito,
at patawad kung magiging masyadong mahaba at marami masyadong bulanas pero pangako,
huli na to, huli na to, huli na to…
Magsisimula ako uli sa umpisa, sa kung paanong nginitian mo ako at tinanong kung san ako nakatira.
Magsisimula ako uli sa umpisa, sa kung paanong nginitian mo ako
Magsisimula ako uli sa umpisa,
Magsisimula ako uli…
Magsisimula ako….
Ito na ang huling tula na isusulat ko para sayo, mali…
Ito na ang huling tula na isinulat ko tungkol sayo
Iniibig kita, at ubos na ubos na ako…
hawakan bitawan saktan
Kapag dumating na ang araw
Na handa ka ng ako'y iwan
Na handa ka ng ako'y bitawan
Na handa ka ng ako'y pakawalan
Sabihin mo lang
Ako ay agad na lilisan.
Kapag dumating na ang araw
Mata koy di mo na nais masdan
Katawan koy di mo na nais hawakan
Labi koy di mo na nais hagkan
Sabihin mo lang
Ako ay agad na lilisan.
Kapag dumating ang araw
Gumising ka at hindi mo na ako mahal
Ang makasama ako ay isa ng hadlang
Pagmamahal koy isa ng malaking sagabal
Sabihin mo lang
Ako ay agad na lilisan.
Ngunit
bago ako lumisan
bago kita pakawalan
bago ako ay iyong iwan
Nais kong ipaalala sayo
Isang tula na minsan
Sinambit ko sayo
Sana maalala mo.
"Nang mawala ka sa akin, ikaw at ako’y nawalan:
Ako dahil ikaw ang minahal ko nang lubusan
At ikaw dahil ako ang sa iyo’y lubusang nagmahal.
Ngunit sa dalawa ay ikaw ang higit na nawalan:
Dahil pwede kong mahalin ang iba tulad nang pagmamahal ko sa iyo
Ngunit ika’y ‘di mamahalin tulad nang kung paano kita minahal."
- Ernesto Cardenal
Na handa ka ng ako'y iwan
Na handa ka ng ako'y bitawan
Na handa ka ng ako'y pakawalan
Sabihin mo lang
Ako ay agad na lilisan.
Kapag dumating na ang araw
Mata koy di mo na nais masdan
Katawan koy di mo na nais hawakan
Labi koy di mo na nais hagkan
Sabihin mo lang
Ako ay agad na lilisan.
Kapag dumating ang araw
Gumising ka at hindi mo na ako mahal
Ang makasama ako ay isa ng hadlang
Pagmamahal koy isa ng malaking sagabal
Sabihin mo lang
Ako ay agad na lilisan.
Ngunit
bago ako lumisan
bago kita pakawalan
bago ako ay iyong iwan
Nais kong ipaalala sayo
Isang tula na minsan
Sinambit ko sayo
Sana maalala mo.
"Nang mawala ka sa akin, ikaw at ako’y nawalan:
Ako dahil ikaw ang minahal ko nang lubusan
At ikaw dahil ako ang sa iyo’y lubusang nagmahal.
Ngunit sa dalawa ay ikaw ang higit na nawalan:
Dahil pwede kong mahalin ang iba tulad nang pagmamahal ko sa iyo
Ngunit ika’y ‘di mamahalin tulad nang kung paano kita minahal."
- Ernesto Cardenal
Iiwan na Kita
Iiwan na kita.
Magpapaalam na ako.
Hindi ko na kayang
mahalin ka.
Hindi ko na kayang magtiis pa.
Wala na akong maibibigay pa.
Ubos na
ubos na ako.
Naibigay ko na lahat sayo.
Iiwan na kita.
Hindi naman ako nararapat rito.
Hindi ako
dapat nasa tabi mo.
Hindi ako dapat ang kaulayaw mo.
Hindi ako sya.
Hindi sya
ako.
Wala ng ako.
Kinuha mo na lahat ng ano mang meron ako.
Iiwan na kita.
Salamat sa mga alaala.
Salamat sa mga ngiti
at oras.
Salamat sa mga hiram na sandaling malamig na pinainit mo.
Salamat sa
ligaya at halik mo.
Iiwan na kita.
Tatapusin ko na ang ating kwento.
Tutuldukan
ko na ang ating istorya.
Puputulin ko na ang ating kanta.
Maglalaho na akong parang
bula.
Iiwan na kita.
Alam ko naman na pwedeng pwede na kitang
iwan.
Hindi mo ako hahanapin. Hindi mo ako aalalahanin.
Hindi mo ko
pipigilin.
Kaya iiwan na kita.
For the spoken poetry version, go here.
Tuesday, July 7, 2015
meet me in the depths of my love for you
The image is from this. The poem below is an original creation that I made; something I wrote which was inspired by the photo above.
Meet me in the depths of my love for you.
Do not shy away or run away from it.
My love may be too much
but it will always be real.
Meet me in the depths of my love for you.
I promise to not smother you with my presence.
My love may be too much
but it will always let you grow.
Meet me in the depths of my love for you.
I assure you that you will never doubt my sincerity.
My love may be too much
but it will never break your heart.
Meet me in the depths of my love for you.
I guarantee that I will find ways to understand
My love may be too much
but I will never not forgive you.
Meet me in the depths of my love for you.
My love is not shallow; it will always be deep.
It may be too much at times
but it will never be lacking.
So meet me in the depths of my love for you
and let us drown in happiness and forever.
Monday, July 6, 2015
Yawyan Alasan presents Combat Wrestling
For those who are interested in being part of this, please send a message to Coach Joamar for the registration form. Early Registration is P200; On the day of the event registration is P300.
For more details, you may also visit their Facebook Page.
Sunday, July 5, 2015
Family bonding at Le Cat Coffee Shop
One of the things that I am always looking out for are things to do during family day. The mall is so common that I try to make it a point to not spend family day there unless there's a movie we want to watch or a new restaurant to try. Thankfully, Le Cat Coffee Shop opened inside BFRV and so today, in spite of the rain, I found the 4 of us heading over to spend some quality time with the cutest fur babies you'll ever meet.
My sister, Mom, and son enjoyed the cats immensely. They found petting them relaxing and as you can see from the photos, they really had fun.
See what I mean? Pure joy. I'm so glad we are able to bond over other things aside from the mall. Thank you to Cat Cafe owners for coming up with this kind of concept.
My sister, Mom, and son enjoyed the cats immensely. They found petting them relaxing and as you can see from the photos, they really had fun.
See what I mean? Pure joy. I'm so glad we are able to bond over other things aside from the mall. Thank you to Cat Cafe owners for coming up with this kind of concept.
munimuni # 87
I have come to realize that though there are a lot of PR firms who are really good in taking care of their bloggers, there are also a lot who at the end of the day treat this as a business. They are right to do that though, since it is a business and at the end of the road, bloggers are just really a number on their ledger.
How many bloggers came? How many wrote about it? Did so and so blogger syndicate us? Did she attend the event? Did they post the press release?
As long as the answer is yes to all of these, you're in good hands with these PR companies. They love you, they adore you, they are your best friends in life. The moment one or more becomes a NO though, they conveniently forget you and stop inviting you and sending items at home.
You become another statistic, a has-been in this sorry "lets all use one another" world.
Due to this, I have become even more choosy of the events that I say yes to and the PR firms that I support. I understand that this is all business but since it is called public RELATIONS, I expected more and perhaps this is why I felt hurt upon realizing that I am just another number on their list.
Another point is that my son is already growing up and has started to really want to spend time with me. He is turning 10 and I know that soon enough, he might not even want to have lunch with me and so I would like to make the most out of the time we have left.
I have sacrificed a couple of events lately but I do not feel bad about it. Time well spent with love ones matter more to me now than any event or freebie. I just wish that other bloggers would realize this as well.
Dessert Food Crawl in Baguio (what to do after summer)
On our last day in Baguio that was sponsored by the Azalea Residences, we were given free time to roam around and explore the city on our own. Lucky for me, I had two friends who were game to join me in my exploration of the city. I honestly did not know what I wanted to do but I knew that I had to get off on Session Road.
What happened next was an epic quest to try out as many desserts as we can on Session Road and the nearby streets. Below are my two companions for this awesome food crawl. Chiki of www.lakbaybaguio.com and Patty of www.pattyvillegas.com/
First stop was Vizcos in Session Road. Chiki said that it had the most delicious Strawberry Shortcake. I was honestly not impressed at the thought of it until I went in and saw how many they have on display and at the back of the restaurant. It seems they really are famous for their Strawberry Shortcake because they had over 30+ in storage just for that day.
As you can see, they used fresh strawberries and I would have expected nothing less since strawberries are very easy to access for them.
Verdict: LOVE IT! Eventhough I am not a fan of this kind of cake, I found myself enjoying the taste. It wasn't too in your face and it melts in your mouth. The strawberries were also very sweet and the icing just right.
Next on our list was Pizza Volante. Chiki said that they have this Choco Vanilla Affair that is a must try.
I cannot believe that this thing is only Php80. It was so creamy and oh so good. Truthfully, I would have wanted to eat this all by myself but I realized that I needed to share and so I did, albeit with a breaking heart. Volante is located across Vizcos in Session Road.
Third on our list was Cafe by the Ruins and this time around, it was a sweet merienda that we aimed for.
We ordered the Champorado and at Php160, it was already good for the 3 of us.
I loved the champorado. The danggit balanced the sweetness of the champorado. It was absolutely divine.
Last stop on our list was Tea House. We had to limit it to 4 places because we were only given 2 hours.
Chona's Delight in Tea House along Session Road is another must try. It's not presented in the best possible way since it is in a container but one bite and you wouldn't care that it was in a plastic storage. Chona's Delight was named after the daughter of the owner. The small one which we got costs Php130 and the bigger one is Php190. This was probably the sweetest dessert we had that day. The chocolate gooey cream is combined with custard filling then topped with chocolate ganache. The whipped cream on top though gets ruined by the cover but then there's the joy of wiping it off using your fingers and then eating that bit straight from your finger to your mouth.
PS.
We also tried the Hill Station beside Mt Cloud BookShop and it was death by chocolate. It is located in Casa Vallejo, Upper Session Road.
This huge slice costs Php130 if I remember it correctly and it is simply layers and layers of chocolate goodness. If you are watching your weight, don't even go near this one. It is definitely sinful.
However, the real dessert to die for in my opinion is this Basil Cream Cake from Cafe Yagam. It doesn't look much but this was the one that I wanted to bring home to my family so they can try this delicious treat.
This piece of heaven felt like I was eating pesto but in a new form entirely and it worked. It really worked. I have to say that I was quite surprised because it was like eating veggies but in cake form and it wasn't icky at all. SUPER DUPER LOVE THIS.
So for those looking for things to do in Baguio after summer, why don't you go on a Baguio Food Crawl? There are still so many things left to discover about Baguio. Afterwards, head over to Azalea Residences and allow them to help you recover from food coma.
What happened next was an epic quest to try out as many desserts as we can on Session Road and the nearby streets. Below are my two companions for this awesome food crawl. Chiki of www.lakbaybaguio.com and Patty of www.pattyvillegas.com/
First stop was Vizcos in Session Road. Chiki said that it had the most delicious Strawberry Shortcake. I was honestly not impressed at the thought of it until I went in and saw how many they have on display and at the back of the restaurant. It seems they really are famous for their Strawberry Shortcake because they had over 30+ in storage just for that day.
 |
| Php130 |
Verdict: LOVE IT! Eventhough I am not a fan of this kind of cake, I found myself enjoying the taste. It wasn't too in your face and it melts in your mouth. The strawberries were also very sweet and the icing just right.
Next on our list was Pizza Volante. Chiki said that they have this Choco Vanilla Affair that is a must try.
 |
| Php80 |
Third on our list was Cafe by the Ruins and this time around, it was a sweet merienda that we aimed for.
We ordered the Champorado and at Php160, it was already good for the 3 of us.
I loved the champorado. The danggit balanced the sweetness of the champorado. It was absolutely divine.
Last stop on our list was Tea House. We had to limit it to 4 places because we were only given 2 hours.
Chona's Delight in Tea House along Session Road is another must try. It's not presented in the best possible way since it is in a container but one bite and you wouldn't care that it was in a plastic storage. Chona's Delight was named after the daughter of the owner. The small one which we got costs Php130 and the bigger one is Php190. This was probably the sweetest dessert we had that day. The chocolate gooey cream is combined with custard filling then topped with chocolate ganache. The whipped cream on top though gets ruined by the cover but then there's the joy of wiping it off using your fingers and then eating that bit straight from your finger to your mouth.
We also tried the Hill Station beside Mt Cloud BookShop and it was death by chocolate. It is located in Casa Vallejo, Upper Session Road.
This huge slice costs Php130 if I remember it correctly and it is simply layers and layers of chocolate goodness. If you are watching your weight, don't even go near this one. It is definitely sinful.
However, the real dessert to die for in my opinion is this Basil Cream Cake from Cafe Yagam. It doesn't look much but this was the one that I wanted to bring home to my family so they can try this delicious treat.
This piece of heaven felt like I was eating pesto but in a new form entirely and it worked. It really worked. I have to say that I was quite surprised because it was like eating veggies but in cake form and it wasn't icky at all. SUPER DUPER LOVE THIS.
So for those looking for things to do in Baguio after summer, why don't you go on a Baguio Food Crawl? There are still so many things left to discover about Baguio. Afterwards, head over to Azalea Residences and allow them to help you recover from food coma.
Azalea Residences in Baguio
I used to be a resident of Baguio and have come back to this place 2x since I left it back in 2004. I have never heard of Azalea Baguio until a friend of mine mentioned it. Fronting Teachers Camp, Azalea Baguio is definitely not hard to find since it is located near one of the main institutions of Baguio which is Teachers Camp.
First impression of the place was not that grand. It was spacious, welcoming, and it was like any other hotel for me. There was nothing outstanding until I looked up. These flowers on the wall surrounding the hotel definitely made it stood out. I liked it very much.
We were given welcome drinks and led to a corner where the briefing was done. Thankfully, my roommates and I had a room prepped and so we were able to head over to our room.
The room we had had 2 rooms and a sofa bed in the middle. It was very spacious and I chose the sofa bed simply because it was right in the middle of everything. It was very comfortable and I had 2 good night's sleep on this bed. There was no air-condition but since it was Baguio, it got pretty chilly at night.
This is the kitchen area which my blogger friends and I turned into a working area since some of us had to bring work to Baguio. Thankfully, this area is also where WiFi was the strongest.
These two, JC and Paul, were our very own personal concierge. I have to say that they did their job very well and really indulged us in our stay there.
A welcome fruit basket awaits you soon as you enter your room and they also give you complimentary water bottles.
They also had 3 remote controls for the television and it was such a funny moment for my roommate and I because we couldn't figure out how to use these.
They also have their own in house restaurant called Tradisyon. They actually have a pretty big selection when it comes to their buffet and the staff were very attentive, prompt, and easy to deal with. This is something that I always look for when it comes to hotels because no matter how fancy shmancy a place is, if the staff is ill mannered, one would never enjoy their stay.
The housekeeping department of Azalea was also very good in handling requests. Sometimes, I make one crazy request just to see if they can do it or would be willing to attempt to do it and during this trip, I requested a USB flash drive so we can transfer a file for a movie to watch.
I was so happy when they looked for one and sent it over. They also had two technicians set it up for us. Though we weren't able to watch because Samsung couldn't read our mp4 files, I was still very much impressed with them because the attempt to make it happen was there.
Staying at Azalea Baguio Residences was very pleasant for me. I never had an incident with any of the staff. The place was clean and well maintained. It is exactly what any hotel should aim for. Most of the hotels I have stayed in always seem to have attitude issues with the staff but for Azalea, this was never a challenge.
I definitely recommend staying at Azalea. It's easy to find, near the city, the place is clean, staff are very friendly and accommodating, and the best part of it is that their rates are very reasonable. What more can you ask for?
Well for those who actually really want a staycation or perhaps to prepare something for someone special, you can also do a home cooked meal because some of their units come with a small table. You can request the concierge to prepare the table to look like this.
The room also comes with cooking materials, an over, a ref, and an electric stove stop. If you are missing something, you can always ask the staff to get it for you. For someone like me who loves preparing Lettuce Wrapped Ground Beef, this was definitely a plus.
To cap it off, you also get a nice view of Baguio. Heaven!
Definitely, Azalea Residences in Baguio made it to my list of places where I would love to stay when I go back to visit. It was a dreamy 3 day stay and I can't wait to go back.
Azalea Residences
We were given welcome drinks and led to a corner where the briefing was done. Thankfully, my roommates and I had a room prepped and so we were able to head over to our room.
The room we had had 2 rooms and a sofa bed in the middle. It was very spacious and I chose the sofa bed simply because it was right in the middle of everything. It was very comfortable and I had 2 good night's sleep on this bed. There was no air-condition but since it was Baguio, it got pretty chilly at night.
 |
| sofa bed as a bed |
 |
| sofa bed as a sofa |
This is the kitchen area which my blogger friends and I turned into a working area since some of us had to bring work to Baguio. Thankfully, this area is also where WiFi was the strongest.
These two, JC and Paul, were our very own personal concierge. I have to say that they did their job very well and really indulged us in our stay there.
A welcome fruit basket awaits you soon as you enter your room and they also give you complimentary water bottles.
They also had 3 remote controls for the television and it was such a funny moment for my roommate and I because we couldn't figure out how to use these.
They also have their own in house restaurant called Tradisyon. They actually have a pretty big selection when it comes to their buffet and the staff were very attentive, prompt, and easy to deal with. This is something that I always look for when it comes to hotels because no matter how fancy shmancy a place is, if the staff is ill mannered, one would never enjoy their stay.
The housekeeping department of Azalea was also very good in handling requests. Sometimes, I make one crazy request just to see if they can do it or would be willing to attempt to do it and during this trip, I requested a USB flash drive so we can transfer a file for a movie to watch.
I was so happy when they looked for one and sent it over. They also had two technicians set it up for us. Though we weren't able to watch because Samsung couldn't read our mp4 files, I was still very much impressed with them because the attempt to make it happen was there.
Staying at Azalea Baguio Residences was very pleasant for me. I never had an incident with any of the staff. The place was clean and well maintained. It is exactly what any hotel should aim for. Most of the hotels I have stayed in always seem to have attitude issues with the staff but for Azalea, this was never a challenge.
I definitely recommend staying at Azalea. It's easy to find, near the city, the place is clean, staff are very friendly and accommodating, and the best part of it is that their rates are very reasonable. What more can you ask for?
Well for those who actually really want a staycation or perhaps to prepare something for someone special, you can also do a home cooked meal because some of their units come with a small table. You can request the concierge to prepare the table to look like this.
The room also comes with cooking materials, an over, a ref, and an electric stove stop. If you are missing something, you can always ask the staff to get it for you. For someone like me who loves preparing Lettuce Wrapped Ground Beef, this was definitely a plus.
To cap it off, you also get a nice view of Baguio. Heaven!
Definitely, Azalea Residences in Baguio made it to my list of places where I would love to stay when I go back to visit. It was a dreamy 3 day stay and I can't wait to go back.
Azalea Residences
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