its just a twig ...

I hate crying. I hate it even more when I cry in public and as much as I want to stop myself from crying, I can't. I pretend that there's just something that was caught in my eye but my friends would know that I'm crying.

I'm a crybaby. It's ironic coz I'm always the first to dish a bitchy line or 2 ... okay, more like 100 bitchy lines but deep inside, I'm a crybaby.

I easily cry especially when it involves people that I love and people that I value. I can't help it. I don't easily care about someone but when I do, I really give it my all. This is not just to a significant other but to friends and family as well.

So whenever something really hurts me and I end up tearing, I just say, "I have something in my eye, you know, like a twig ... or a branch."

When was the last time you cried?

"The Hanging Tree"

Are you, are you coming to the tree
Where they strung up a man they say murdered three.
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree.

Are you, are you coming to the tree
Where the dead man called out for his love to flee.
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree.

Are you, are you coming to the tree
Where I told you to run so we’d both be free.
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree.

Are you, are you coming to the tree
Wear a necklace of rope, side by side with me.
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree.

by Sam Cushion & Rachel Macwhirter

*** this is a song from the book Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins. I can't wait for the movie to come out. I have read the book twice and I love it.

paying it forward

I've never really watched the film Pay It Forward but I do know the gist of it. Someone does a good deed and if you are the recipient of one, you need to pay it forward or do a good deed to another perfect stranger.

Random strangers have been nice to me in the past and I try to do the same when an opportunity  presents itself to me. I may stand to let an old woman seat even if it means I will be riding the bus for at least an hour standing up. I may share my umbrella with someone when there is rain and this other person doesn't have an umbrella because someone has done this for me as well. I may pay for someone's meal without them knowing or make a donation somewhere.

I wish that more people would pay it forward. It saddens me and angers me like no other when people act like they've been done an injustice when asked to pay it forward or do something nice. Seriously, these people should just get struck by lightning.

When was the last time you paid it forward? 

that's all ...

We talked
We laughed

I feel happy cause we spoke again,
sad cause that's all we can do.

ring ring ...

I made this based on a real event. I called someone hoping to hear their voice ...

I dialed your number
Anticipating to hear your voice
Phone rang; my heart pounded
And it kept ringing ...

after 2 years ...

We met again. We had dinner at Teriyaki Boy then coffee at Starbucks. Neil paid for it all. Yey! 

And for some reason, we ordered too much food. 

To think that there were just 3 of us and the other  2  were body conscious. 

It was a fun night. I was with my high school best friend and my high school crush who is now a really good friend. Good times!

50 Book Challenge update v3

1. Cross Roads by James Patterson
2. Being Happy
3. Chicken Soup for the Coffee Lover's Soul
4. Hope for the Flowers by Trina Paulus
5. Have a Little Faith by Mitch Albom
6. He's Just Not that Into You
7. Little Women
8. PS I Love You by  Cecelia Ahern
9. Ako ay Pilipino
10. Chicken Soup for the Chocolate Lover's Soul
11. Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
12. Mocking Jay by Suzanne Collins
13. Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins
14. Toys by James Patterson
15. Lipstick Jungle by Candace Bushnell
16. City of Bones by Cassandra Clare
17. City of Ashes by Cassandra Clare
18. City of Glass by Cassandra Clare
19. City of Fallen Angels by Cassandra Clare
20. Southern Lights by Danielle Steel
21. Tick Tock by James Patterson
22. Love, Rosie by Cecilia Ahern

and so I remain silent

I used to post a lot about my thoughts and my hurts ... I write about it and I dwell o it ... but I've realized last night halfway through a Mango Margarita that no matter how many times I post about it, or talk about it, it will never change.

And so I have decided that I shall remain silent ... and in my silence, this person will no longer know what is on my mind ... what is in my heart, and he will not know what is going on in my head.

No one will.

Twins 23rd Birthday

Happy birthday Twins! MWAH!

do not want me

Heartless ...
fascinating ...
daunting ...
insensitive.

You are all these and more.
You own me but do not want me.

Izmet and Josephine's wedding

Sunday night, I went to Sofitel Hotel to attend the wedding of a high school classmate. I decided to go because she invited me and I was touched that she even remembered me. As with any wedding, it was full of love and you can just feel the happiness in the couple.

My date for the night was my sister because GO couldn't make it. It was her first time to be at Sofitel and to go around the place and I knew that she enjoyed it  because at the end of the night, she thanked me for bringing her there. I'm glad that she was my date.

6th meet up of the SB group

Last Monday, the group met up again and this time, we had Miss Claudine as our  special guest. She flew all the way from China and as always, the group had a lot of fun.

To be honest, I wasn't that into it at the beginning of the meet up. I'm not sure if it was because of the heartache I had over the weekend. Maybe it was that, maybe it was something else. What I do know is that this night ended in a pretty special way; one that I am not yet ready to talk about.

Maybe it will be a new entry to my love stories tag ... maybe it will just stay in my mind.

For now, here are the photos of the meet up.

with GO ... yep ... him again LOL

with Rain ... he's my BIG BROTHER in the group

with some of my favorite people in the group

with GO and Claudine

the  exchanging of SB Cards

the 6th CLASS PICTURE

twistato madness

My sister, B and I had some fun earlier today with potatoes ... twistato that is. I think we looked mad no? Hahahaha.

Twas a fun morning.

answered prayer

Last night I prayed
Today it was answered
I received what was due
My heart broken in two.

Jesus Christ Superstar

Saturday did not start out so well for me. A broken heart is never a good way to start the day but I digress. It  rained almost half the day and I felt lousy and lazy. I was supposed to meet my friend Mike but I didn't go through with it. I was just not in the mood to go out. I was supposed to watch a play with Chris but I also canceled on him.

Throughout the day, I got different invitations from different people to go elsewhere and I was so tempted. Then I remembered that I promised a friend of mine, Kevin, that I would support him on his stage play. I said to myself that if it stops raining by 5pm, I would go. 430pm and the rain stops. I sent a text to Chris and told him that it was a go.

The play itself which was done as a culminating activity by adult work-shoppers was a disaster. The Judas guy garbles his words and screams. He does not sing. He attempts but he fails miserably. The Jesus guy ... it may be blasphemous but it was the first time in my life that I saw Jesus as emo, egoistic, irrational, selfish, and self centered. He, too, cannot sing.

The highlight of the play was thankfully, Kevin. He played King Herod and he played it to the hilt. He was funny and IMO, he stole the show. He was in his element and in his character the whole time even when he was just standing in the corner. It was good to see someone who was in his element and who felt real passion for the theater.

He's the orange guy.

And here is my friend Chris who kept me company and with whom I exchanged a lot of verbal diarrhea with. Hahahaha.

us during intermission, extremely bored hahahaha

and the best photo of the night ...

chicken burger rocked!

Do I regret watching? Nope. Though it was not great, it was worth it because of Chris and because of Kevin ... both guys my good friends. :)