Loving Yourself when it's Hard

One of the things that I found hard to learn was to love myself. It was a struggle and a big challenge especially when I have used being in a relationship as a crutch my whole life. 

I didn't realize it back then, but I kept looking for love in the arms of another and then sabotaging that love because I felt that I didn't deserve to be loved. Someone who mattered a lot to me told me that I didn't deserve to be loved, and I believed him. 

It took me a long time before I realized that what he said to me wasn't true. Thankfully, I had people around me who rallied me and helped me through all these. 

Here are 10 things that I did to help me learn how to love myself. 

• Practice Self-Compassion
• Treat yourself with the kindness you would show to a close friend. Instead of criticizing your mistakes, remind yourself that everyone makes them and use them as opportunities to grow.
• Set Healthy Boundaries
• Learn to say no to things that drain your energy or compromise your values. Respecting your time and energy is a key step toward self-love.
• Celebrate Your Strengths
• Make a list of things you’re good at, accomplishments you’re proud of, or qualities that make you unique. Refer to it whenever self-doubt creeps in.
• Take Care of Your Body
• Show love to yourself by prioritizing your physical well-being. Regular exercise, nutritious food, adequate sleep, and staying hydrated all contribute to a healthier mindset.
• Surround Yourself with Positive Influences
• Spend time with people who uplift and support you. Distance yourself from those who bring negativity or make you question your self-worth.
• Practice Mindfulness
• Focus on the present moment without judgment. Mindfulness can help you recognize negative thought patterns and replace them with more constructive and affirming thoughts.
• Engage in Activities You Enjoy
• Spend time doing things that bring you happiness and fulfillment. Whether it’s painting, reading, gardening, or dancing, prioritize hobbies that nourish your soul.
• Accept Imperfections
• Embrace the fact that nobody is perfect. Instead of striving for unrealistic ideals, appreciate the beauty of your imperfections—they make you human and unique.
• Affirm Yourself Daily
• Start each day with positive affirmations. Simple statements like, “I am enough,” or, “I deserve happiness and love,” can gradually shift your mindset toward self-acceptance.
• Seek Professional Help if Needed
• If self-love feels unattainable due to deep-rooted issues, consider talking to a therapist. They can provide guidance and tools to help you work through challenges and build a healthier relationship with yourself.

Remember, learning to love yourself is a journey, not a destination. Take it one step at a time, and be patient with yourself along the way.

This was how I managed to do it. It took a long time, in fact, it took years, but when I finally got to the place where I truly loved myself, everything that I went through was worth it. 

So be patient with yourself. You deserve to love yourself and you deserve to get to know yourself.