forbidden ...

3x in my life, I have fallen for someone forbidden. Those loves, be it for one reason or another, has left a mark on me. I loved them deeply ... however, it just wasn't meant to be. It couldn't be.

It was forbidden.

F # 1: I met him when I was 18. I wasn't over my first boyfriend yet but he manages to always make me laugh. We hanged out a lot. He was in for a visit and we clicked. We just  clicked.

He was funny, witty, and he could dance up a storm. He also liked it when I dress sexily. He wasn't like MU who'd make a huge fuss if I show a bit of skin. 

Unfortunately, amongst the 3 forbidden love stories, this is the most forbidden. It will never be accepted by society. It will never be understood. It will never happen ... it couldn't.

We ended it even before it could really start. He was there and I was here and it just wasn't going to happen. It couldn't ... as much as my heart was breaking, I knew that it had to end and so I ended it.

F # 2 was someone I met through a workshop. He was much older and I was still jail bait by society's standards. It didn't help that he was in showbiz and was taking on sexy roles.

He was decent, mature, and he  had a dream. Unfortunately, my Mom disapproved and was really hurt by this. I had to make a choice. It was him or my Mom. I chose my Mom and ended things with  him.

F # 3 ... now this is the person who has made an impact on my life. He blew me away.  I never stood a chance. I was his for the taking and no matter how much I resisted, I was a lost cause.

So I prayed ... I prayed so hard for God to take him away from me and He did. Now, there is just an empty hole where he used to be and I am lost. I long for him ... yet I know I shouldn't.

He is forbidden.

This is forbidden.

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